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Share(ג) אֲנִ֤י לְדוֹדִי֙ וְדוֹדִ֣י לִ֔י
א ל ו ל
(3) I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine
(Siddur Rabbi Yaabetz)
(Maharil, 1365-1427, Germany)
In the midst of strife, I found there was, within me, an invincible love.
In the midst of tears, I found there was, within me, an invincible smile.
In the midst of chaos, I found there was within me, an invincible calm.
In the depth of winter, I finally learned that within me, there lay, an invincible summer. And, that makes me happy.
For it says, that no matter how hard the world pushes against me, within me, there’s something stronger…
(Albert Camus, 1913-1960)
God is my light and my refuge secure —
Whom Shall I Fear?
God is the stronghold of my life —
of whom should I be afraid?
When those who act with malice
would devour me with words,
it is they who stumble,
they who fall.
If an army were to take up arms against me,
my heart would not fear.
If War were waged against me,
still I would trust.
Just one thing I have asked of God;
only this do I seek:
to dwell in God's house all the days of my life,
to behold divine sweetness and beauty,
and to gaze in delight at God's temple.
God shelters me in times of hardship,
Shields me in a tent of divine protection,
raises me high upon a rock
so that now my head rises above the enemies around me.
Let me make offerings in that tent — the offerings of a joyful cry.
Let me sing hymns,
and celebrate the one who is eternal — Adonai.
Hear my voice when I call;
God, answer me with grace.
My heart spoke for you — it said: “Seek My face.”
Your face, Adonai, I will seek.
Do not hide Your face from me,
nor angrily turn away Your faithful one —
the one You have sustained.
My God-of-rescue, do not desert me!
When my father and my mother have gone,
God will gather me in.
Teach me Your way, Adonai;
and guide me on a straight path,
because of those who lie in wait for me.
Do not hand me over to the will of foes
who rose against me —
lying witnesses and those whose very breath is violence.
If only I could believe that I will see God's goodness
in the land of the living…
Wait for Adonai.
Be strong of heart, and be bold — but wait for Adonai.
Translation from Mishkan HaLev
Traditionally, this psalm is read every day of Elul. Its verses reflect a range of human emotion and a wavering sense of faith appropriate to these days of spiritual struggle. The speaker's confident serenity is disrupted by an anxious awareness of surroundings threats. Not certainty but quest is the dominant mood: the search for light, peace, and strength in tumultuous times. The last verse — “wait for Adonai” — suggests the value of repeated recitation of the psalm. Courage and inner peace come with patience, discipline, and development of a spiritual practice.
Music by Chava Mirel:
Achat sha'alti mei-eit Adonai
Achat sha'alti, otah avakeish
Shivti, shivti, b'veit Adonai
Shivti, shivti, kol y'mei chayai
lachazot b'noam Adonai
ul'vakeir b'heichalo
lachazot b'noam Adonai
to gaze upon the beauty of Adonai
One thing, one thing I ask you Adonai
To be with You, all of my life