Reading Avivah Zornberg on Exodus - Parshat Va'era Motivations for communicating or not.
Background: Avivah Zornberg grew up in a world of rabbinic tradition and scholarship (her father - the head of the beit din in Glasgow, Scotland) and received a Ph.D. in English literature from Cambridge University. The Particulars of Rapture (2001), the sequel to her award-winning study of the Book of Genesis (1995), takes its title from a line by the American poet Wallace Stevens about the interdependence of opposite things, such as male and female, and conscious and unconscious. Her quest in this book, as she writes in the introduction, is "to find those who will hear with me a particular idiom of redemption," who will hear "within the particulars of rapture . . . what cannot be expressed."
Moses through his own eyes and reasons why he shouldn't lead: Moses famously uses an odd description to explain his inability to communicate: he says that he has uncircumcised lips.

On the one hand this can come to mean that the fault is with Moses (that he may even have a physical disability that limits him in his role as a communicator).

Alternatively, the descriptor of his lips is based on an internalised narrative created by the reception he gets from his audience. Just like the spies in the desert that said "we are as small as grasshoppers" - they were not in fact the size of grasshoppers, instead they felt like they were based on their encounter with other.

Similarly, the commentator Sfas Emes points out that Moses describes himself in this fashion because the people refused to listen to him. So if they cannot hear, then perhaps it is because he cannot speak. The Sfas Emes goes on to say that prophets are made by the community (Ps50:7) that is willing to heed the message of the prophet otherwise they are just a person screaming into the wind.
(ז) שִׁמְעָ֤ה עַמִּ֨י ׀ וַאֲדַבֵּ֗רָה יִ֭שְׂרָאֵל וְאָעִ֣ידָה בָּ֑ךְ אֱלֹהִ֖ים אֱלֹהֶ֣יךָ אָנֹֽכִי׃

(7) “Listen, My people, and I will speak, O Israel, and I will arraign you. I am God, your God.

Other reasons for his hesitancy: In a midrashic interpretation of the stand-off between God and Moses where Moses spells out all of the reasons why he cannot lead the people towards liberation one of the points that Moses keeps coming around to is that his older brother Aaron has not only the skills to lead as he is the better communicator of the two, but more importantly in the eyes of the Biblical text.. he is the older of the two. This midrash reads Moses and Aaron as the new paradigm of brotherly relations. Unlike Cain and Abel or Jacob and Esau .. the two chosen to redeem the Israelites are the ones that don't let ego divide the family.
(י) וַיֹּ֨אמֶר מֹשֶׁ֣ה אֶל־יְהוָה֮ בִּ֣י אֲדֹנָי֒ לֹא֩ אִ֨ישׁ דְּבָרִ֜ים אָנֹ֗כִי גַּ֤ם מִתְּמוֹל֙ גַּ֣ם מִשִּׁלְשֹׁ֔ם גַּ֛ם מֵאָ֥ז דַּבֶּרְךָ אֶל־עַבְדֶּ֑ךָ כִּ֧י כְבַד־פֶּ֛ה וּכְבַ֥ד לָשׁ֖וֹן אָנֹֽכִי׃ (יא) וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יְהוָ֜ה אֵלָ֗יו מִ֣י שָׂ֣ם פֶּה֮ לָֽאָדָם֒ א֚וֹ מִֽי־יָשׂ֣וּם אִלֵּ֔ם א֣וֹ חֵרֵ֔שׁ א֥וֹ פִקֵּ֖חַ א֣וֹ עִוֵּ֑ר הֲלֹ֥א אָנֹכִ֖י יְהוָֽה׃ (יב) וְעַתָּ֖ה לֵ֑ךְ וְאָנֹכִי֙ אֶֽהְיֶ֣ה עִם־פִּ֔יךָ וְהוֹרֵיתִ֖יךָ אֲשֶׁ֥ר תְּדַבֵּֽר׃ (יג) וַיֹּ֖אמֶר בִּ֣י אֲדֹנָ֑י שְֽׁלַֽח־נָ֖א בְּיַד־תִּשְׁלָֽח׃ (יד) וַיִּֽחַר־אַ֨ף יְהוָ֜ה בְּמֹשֶׁ֗ה וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ הֲלֹ֨א אַהֲרֹ֤ן אָחִ֙יךָ֙ הַלֵּוִ֔י יָדַ֕עְתִּי כִּֽי־דַבֵּ֥ר יְדַבֵּ֖ר ה֑וּא וְגַ֤ם הִנֵּה־הוּא֙ יֹצֵ֣א לִקְרָאתֶ֔ךָ וְרָאֲךָ֖ וְשָׂמַ֥ח בְּלִבּֽוֹ׃

(10) But Moses said to the LORD, “Please, O Lord, I have never been a man of words, either in times past or now that You have spoken to Your servant; I am slow of speech and slow of tongue.” (11) And the LORD said to him, “Who gives man speech? Who makes him dumb or deaf, seeing or blind? Is it not I, the LORD? (12) Now go, and I will be with you as you speak and will instruct you what to say.” (13) But he said, “Please, O Lord, make someone else Your agent.” (14) The LORD became angry with Moses, and He said, “There is your brother Aaron the Levite. He, I know, speaks readily. Even now he is setting out to meet you, and he will be happy to see you.

Consequences of hesitation and implications of those consequences:

The Midrash continues that Aaron is an altruistic leader and is happy to follow in the footsteps of his younger brother. This altruism is the quality that enables his descendants to be the cohanim... to be the priests serving God in the tabernacle and in the future Temple in Jerusalem instead Moses' descendants. This demotion comes as a result of God declaring his anger at Moses' refusal to lead the people. This is the first time in the Torah that God is described as angry.

Perhaps this angry punishment is for a higher purpose, maybe it is a test for the brothers? The midrash imagines that they pass the test as Moses congratulates his brother for his new lofty role and Aaron bemoans his younger brothers inability to serve in an ongoing role and one of such close proximity to God. They truly are the vanguard of a new brotherly and prophetic paradigm.
Page 89.. Avivah Zornberg with a keen eye towards the subconscious motivations of Biblical characters postulates that Moses' saint-like reverence for his older brother comes from the absence of a father figure... the Pharaoh in whose home he was brought into as a baby. This awkward dynamic between Moses and his family-like relationship with Pharaoh sets up an interesting dynamic with Moses and his own family - with Aaron and Miriam. Perhaps with this family, Moses will do anything to not lose them as he has already lost so much.
(כג) וַיְהִי֩ בַיָּמִ֨ים הָֽרַבִּ֜ים הָהֵ֗ם וַיָּ֙מָת֙ מֶ֣לֶךְ מִצְרַ֔יִם וַיֵּאָנְח֧וּ בְנֵֽי־יִשְׂרָאֵ֛ל מִן־הָעֲבֹדָ֖ה וַיִּזְעָ֑קוּ וַתַּ֧עַל שַׁוְעָתָ֛ם אֶל־הָאֱלֹהִ֖ים מִן־הָעֲבֹדָֽה׃

(23) A long time after that, the king of Egypt died. The Israelites were groaning under the bondage and cried out; and their cry for help from the bondage rose up to God.

As Avivah Zornberg points out - there are many Biblical commentators that point out the drama of Moses' adoptive father dying in the waters along with all of his soldiers and their chariots after the waters part and come back together.

However, the verse from Exodus points out that Pharaoh had died. So many commentators read that sentence as a metaphor.. he did not actual die in body but it as though he did die but instead just became severely ill with leprosy.

This helps maintain the symmetry of the Pharaoh that ordered for babies to be thrown in the Nile to have his own son killed. Otherwise, the literary symmetry breaks with it being Moses' brother who never ordered the death of Israelite boys - but did perpetuate the slavery of the people.
Other consequences: Not only does Moses lose the role of cohanim for his descendants but he himself loses the ability to enter into the Land of Israel because he refused to lead the people.
ביד תשלח. בְּיַד מִי שֶׁאַתָּה רָגִיל לִשְׁלֹחַ, וְהוּא אַהֲרֹן. דָּ"אַ: בְּיַד אַחֵר שֶׁתִּרְצֶה לִשְׁלֹחַ, אֵין סוֹפִי לְהַכְנִיסָם לָאָרֶץ וְלִהְיוֹת גּוֹאֲלָם לֶעָתִיד, יֵשׁ לְךָ שְׁלוּחִים הַרְבֵּה:

By the hand of some other person whom You choose to send — for in the end “I” shall not bring them into the land of Israel nor shall “I” become their deliverer in the future — and You have many messengers! (Pirkei DeRabbi Eliezer 40)

This interpretation by Rashi and many other midrashic interpretations is not that Moses was guided by a deference to his older brother in some sort of subconscious grasping towards a fatherly figure, instead it is quite the opposite.. Moses feels very alone in this world and he is not even special amongst the prophets of God so why should he bear the brunt of Pharaoh if there will be many more Israelite prophets working to redeem this people.
Page 97.. There is a midrash where Moses is attacked by God and nearly killed because of his negligence in circumcising his son. The Hebrew for circumcision and the Hebrew for word is "Milah". Moses is seen as negligent or subpar in these two fields. Perhaps this is one reason he describes himself as having uncircumcised lips. His word is lacking but it is not his fate.