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Share- God proposes: “Now then, if you will obey Me faithfully and keep My covenant, you shall be My treasured possession among all the peoples” (Exodus 19:5).
- The people accept: “All the people answered as one, saying, ‘All that the Eternal has spoken we will do!’” (Exodus 19:8).
- The people cleanse themselves, as at a mikvah (Jewish ritual bath, traditionally used by a bride before the wedding): “Moses came down from the mountain to the people and warned the people to stay pure, and they washed their clothes” (Exodus 19:14).
- Then God and the people join under a chuppah: “Moses led the people out of the camp toward God, and they took their places beneath [at the foot of] the mountain. Now Mount Sinai was all in smoke, for the Eternal had come down upon it in fire” (Exodus 19:17-18).
- There is a ketubah: “The Eternal said to Moses, “Come up to Me on the mountain and wait there, and I will give you the stone tablets with the teachings and commandments which I have inscribed to instruct them” (Exodus 24:12).
(א) רִבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן הֲוָה יָתִיב וְלָעֵי בְּאוֹרַיְיתָא בְּלֵילְיָא (אמור צ"ח א) דְּכַלָּה אִתְחַבְּרַת בְּבַעֲלָהּ. דְּתָנִינָן כָּל אִנּוּן חַבְרַיָא דִּבְנֵי הֵיכָלָא דְּכַלָּה אִצְטְרִיכוּ בְּהַהִיא לֵילְיָא דְּכַלָּה אִזְדַּמְנַת לְמֶהֱוֵי לְיוֹמָא אַחֲרָא גּוֹ חוּפָּה בְּבַעֲלָהּ לְמֶהוֵי עִמָּהּ כָּל הַהוּא לֵילְיָא, וּלְמֶחֱדֵי עִמָּהּ בְּתִקּוּנָהָא דְאִיהִי אִתְתַּקָּנַת לְמִלְעֵי בְּאוֹרַיְיתָא מִתּוֹרָה לִנְבִיאִים וּמִנְבִיאִים לִכְתוּבִים וּבְמִדְרָשׁוֹת דִּקְרָאֵי וּבְרָזֵי דְחָכְמְתָא. בְּגִין דְּאִלֵּין אִנּוּן תִּיקּוּנִין דִּילָהּ וְתַכְשִׁיטָהָא. וְאִיהִי וְעוּלֵמְתָהָא עָאלַת וְקַיְימַת עַל רֵישֵׁיהוֹן וְאִתְתַּקָּנַת בְּהוּ וְחָדַת בְּהוּ כָּל הַהוּא לֵילְיָא. וּלְיוֹמָא אָחֳרָא לָא עָאלַת לַחוּפָּה אֶלָּא בַּהֲדַיְיהוּ. וְאִלֵּין אִקְרוּן בְּנֵי חוּפָּתָא. וְכֵיוָן דְּעָאלַת לְחוּפָּתָא קוּדְשָׁא בְּרִיךְ הוּא שָׁאִיל עֲלַיְיהוּ וּמְבָרֵךְ לוֹן וּמְעַטֵּר לוֹן בְּעִטְּרָהָא דְּכַלָּה. זַכָּאָה חוּלַקְהוֹן.
(1) Rabbi Shimon was sitting and studying the Torah on the night when the Bride, Malchut, unites with her husband, Zeir Anpin. And all the friends present in the bridal chamber on that night, the eve of the holiday of Shavuot, must stand together with the bridegroom under the Huppah, and be with him this whole night, and rejoice with him in the perfections of the Bride, i.e., study the Torah, then Prophets, then Holy Scriptures, and finally the wisdom, for these corrections are the Bride’s adornments. And the Bride receives perfections, adorns herself with them, and rejoices with them all of that night. And on the next day, on the holiday of Shavuot, she only comes to the Huppah together with them. And her friends, who studied the Torah all night long, are called the sons of the Huppah. And as she approaches the Huppah, the Creator asks about them, blesses and adorns them with the Bride’s adornments. Happy are those who merit this!
כתובה לחג השבועות – ר׳ ישראל נג׳ארה |
יָרַד דּוֹדִי לְגַנּוֹ לַעֲרֻגוֹת בָּשְׂמוֹ |
שְׂרָפִים וְאוֹפַנִּים נָטַשׁ וּפָרָשָׁיו וְרִכְבּוֹ |
רַעְיָתִי יוֹנָתִי בֹּאִי אִתִּי לִדְבִיר וְאוּלָם |
אָמְרָה אֲיֻמָּה אֶת־שִׁמְעַת דּוֹד שְׁמַעְתִּֽיהוּ |
לְחֻפָּה נִתְרַצְּתָה מְחֹלַ֖ת הַֽמַּחֲנָֽיִם |
וַיְהִי הַקֶּֽשֶׁר אַמִּיץ עִם עַם זוּ קָנָה בְּסִינָי |
בְּשִׁשִּׁי בַשַּׁבָּת אַגִּיד אֶת־הָרָשׁוּם בִּכְתָב הַנִּשְׁתְּוָן יוֹם לְהַנְחִיל אוֹהֲבָיו תּוֹרָה אֵל חַי נִתְכַּוָּן שִׁשָּׁה יָמִים לְחֹֽדֶשׁ סִיוָן׃ |
בְּיוֹם מִסִּינַ֥י בָּא֙ וְזָרַ֤ח מִשֵּׂעִיר֙ אֵל נֶעְלָם |
לְמִנְיָן שֶׁאָנוּ מוֹנִין וּקְהַל עֲדָתִי בְּכׇל־תְּפוּצוֹתֶֽיהָ פֹּה בָּאָֽרֶץ הַלֵּזוּ בְּיַד אֵל נִתְלוּ אָשְׁיוֹתֶֽיהָ כִּי־ה֭וּא עַל־יַמִּ֣ים יְסָדָ֑הּ וְעַל־נְ֝הָר֗וֹת יְכוֹנְנֶֽהָ׃ (תהלים כד:ב) |
אֵיךְ הֶחָתָן שַׂר שָׂרִים וּנְגִיד נְגִידִים |
אָמַר לַיְקָרָה וּנְעִימָה הַבַּת רַבַּת מַעֲלוֹת |
יָמִים רַבִּים תִּהְיִי־לִי וַאֲנִי אֵלַֽיִךְ לְגוֹאֵל |
וַאֲנָא אוֹקִיר וְאֵזוּן יָתִיכִי וַאֲכַסֶּה |
וִיהִֽיבְנָא לֵֽיכִי מֹֽהַר בְּתוּלַֽיְכִי |
וּצְבִיאַת כַּלְתָא דָא וַהֲוַת לֵיהּ לְאִנְתּוּ |
וּצְבִי חֲתָנָא דְנָא וְהוֹסִיף עַל עִקַּר כְּתֻבָּתָהּ מַה שֶּׁתַּלְמִיד וָתִיק עָתִיד לְחַדֵּשׁ בְּאוֹרַיְתָא וְסִפְרָא וְסִפְרֵי וְאַגָּדָה וְתוֹסֶפְתָּא׃ |
הִקְדִּים לָהּ בְּתוֹרַת מֻקְדָּם רְמַ״ח מִצְוֺת עֲשֵׂה מֵהֶן לֹא יְמִישׁוּן כִּי אוֹתָם יוֹם־יוֹם יִדְרוֹשׁוּן אֶת־הַדֶּ֙רֶךְ֙ יֵ֣לְכוּ בָ֔הּ וְאֶת־הַֽמַּעֲשֶׂ֖ה אֲשֶׁ֥ר יַעֲשֽׂוּן׃ (שמות יח:כ) |
וְעוֹד כָּתַב לָהּ בְּתוֹרַת מְאֻחָר מִצְוֺת לֹא־תַעֲשֶׂה נִקְדָּשׁוּ לְמִנְיַן שְׁלֹשׁ מֵאוֹת וְשִׁשִּׁים וַחֲמִשָּׁה פָּשׁוּ מַעֲשִׂים֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר לֹא־יֵֽעָשׂ֔וּ׃ (בראשית כ:ט) |
וְדָא נְדוּנְיָא דְהַנְעֵלַת לֵיהּ כַּלְּתָא דָא לַעֲלוֹת וְלֵרָאוֹת מֵאֵת אָבִֽיהָ אֲדוֹן הַנִּפְלָאוֹת לֵב֙ לָדַ֔עַת וְאׇזְנַ֣יִם לִשְׁמֹ֑עַ וְעֵינַ֥יִם לִרְא֖וֹת׃ (דברים כט:ג) |
נִמְצָא סָךְ הַכֹּל בֵּין כְּתֻבָּה וּנְדוּנְיָא וְחֵֽקֶר כְּבוֹדָם וְתוֹסֶֽפֶת וּמְאֻחָר וּמֻקְדָּם |
וְרָצָה הֶחָתָן לְזַכּוֹת אֶת־יִשְׂרָאֵל עַם גּוֹרָלוֹ |
וְקִבֵּל עָלָיו הֶחָתָן אַחֲרָיוּת שְׁטַר כְּתֻבָּה |
וְקִבְּלוּ תַרְוֵיהוֹן תְּנָאִים נָאִים הַכֹּל בִּכְתָב נֶאֶסְפוּ אָסוֹף כׇּל־אֶחָד מֵהֶם כַּאֲשֶׁר יִכְסוֹף |
מַעֲשֶׂה יָדֶֽיהָ לוֹ וְעָלָיו כׇּל־תַּכְשִׁיטֶֽיהָ |
וְהַיְרֻשָּׁה כְּמִנְהַג דָּת וָדִין עַל־לוּחַ חֲרוּתָה |
וְהַדִּירָה תּוֹרָה בְּקֶֽרֶן זָוִית מְעוֹנָהּ |
וְשֶׁלֹּא יִשָׂא אִשָּׁה אַחֶֽרֶת עָלֶֽיהָ מִיַלְדֵי נׇכְרִים הַנְּלוֹזוֹת כִּי אִם בְּבַת שַׁעֲשׁוּעִים יִדְבַּק וְאוֹתָהּ יָשִׂים בַּלֵּב וּבֶחָזוֹת |
וְשֶׁלֹּא־יַנִיחֶֽנָּה מִתּוֹךְ כַּֽעַס וְהִתְרַשְּׁלוּת |
וְשֶׁלֹּא יְמַשְׁכֵּן כְּלֵי חֶמְדָּה וְלֹא יִמְכּוֹר |
וְשֶׁלֹא יֵצֵא לְמָקוֹם רָחוֹק אוֹ בַיָם יָשִׂים נְתִיבוֹ כִּי אִם סֵֽפֶר תּוֹרָה מֻנָּח נֶֽגֶד לִבּוֹ |
וְכׇל־הַתְּנָאִים הַלָּלוּ שְׁרִירִים וְקַיָּמִים |
וְנִשְׁבַּע הֶחָתָן לְקַיֵם כׇּל־דָּבָר לַהֲמוֹנוֹ |
וְקָנָה הֶחָתָן קִנְיָנִים חֲמִשָּׁה |
יִרְא֣וּ צַדִּיקִ֣ים וְיִשְׂמָ֑חוּ וְיֹאכְלוּ אֶת־פִּרְיָם |
וַיָּ֤קֶם עֵד֨וּת ׀ בְּֽיַעֲקֹ֗ב וְתוֹרָה֮ שָׂ֤ם בְּיִשְׂרָ֫אֵ֥ל בְּמֶֽרֶץ וְאָמַר לְהָקִים גְּדֵרֶֽיהָ מֵאֵין פּוֹרֵץ פֶּֽרֶץ וְאָעִ֣ידָה לִּ֔י עֵדִ֖ים נֶֽאֱמָנִ֑ים – אֶת־הַשָּׁמַ֣יִם וְאֶת־הָאָ֒רֶץ֒׃ (דברים ל:יט) |
יִשְׂמַח חָתָן עִם־כַּלָּה לְקָחָהּ לוֹ לְגוֹרָלוֹ |
Ketubah for Shavuot by R' Yisrael Najara (c. 16th Century)
Translation by Isaac Gantwerk Mayer
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My Beloved went down to the garden, His spice-beds, To make love to the noble daughter and spread over her His peace-shelter. A palanquin King Solomon made for himself. (Song of Songs 3:9) |
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Fire-serpents and Wheel-angels leave, and His cavalry and riders And between the breasts of the beloved fawn there He dwelt, |
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“My companion, my dove, come with me to the Sanctum and Courtyard, For for your sake I will leave all My multitudes above and their force. And I will betroth you to Me forever.” (Hosea 2:21) |
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Said the awesome feminine, “I have heard word of the Beloved, And have loved Him with an eternal love.Let Him kiss me with the kisses of His mouth! (Song of Songs 1:2) |
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To the marriage-chamber let us run, the double-camp dance!” And per “We will do and hear” she took 600,000 beautiful ornaments, in the third month of Israel’s escape from the land of Egypt. (Exodus 19:1) |
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And the bond was steadfast with the people whom He acquired at Sinai, And the acquisition-book and seal I will read in the multitude’s ears: Behold, this is writ before me. |
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On the sixth day I will tell the inscription in the written document. A day the Living God intended for His beloveds to inherit the Torah, Six days into the month of Sivan. |
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On the day the hidden God came fron Sinai and rose from Seir He was shining from Mount Paran over all the kings of nations, In the year 2446 of the creation of existence. |
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Per the count that we count, and my community band in all her diasporas, |
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How is the Groom, Chief of chiefs and Prince of princes? One and Only is He, dwelling alone. His palate is sweet and he is altogether lovely. (Song of Songs 5:16) |
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He said to the honored and sweet one, daughter of many ascents — She found favor in his eyes over all the women and virgins, Beautiful as the moon, clear as the sun, awesome as the bannered ones (Song of Songs 6:10) |
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“Many days you will be Mine and I will redeem you. Here, I’ve sent you accounts better than gold by Yekuthiel (Moses)’s hand. Be My wife according to the laws of Moses and Israel. |
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And I will honor and support you and cover you, For I will be with You as a shelter, refuge, and coverage, And a throne is established in kindness. (Isaiah 16:5) |
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And I give to you the dowry of your virginity — The wise Torah, source of life. You will live, as will your sons. He heals all your diseases. He redeems your life from the Pit. (Psalms 103:3-4) |
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And the bride has agreed and become His wife, And an eternal covenant, a steadfast bond, between them they set. Day and night it will not cease. |
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And the groom agreed and added to the text of her marriage-writ, What a veteran student will one day innovate in the Torah, And the Sifra and the Sifre and the Aggadah and the Tosefta. |
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He provided her the prior Torah: 248 positive commandments indispensible, |
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And more, he wrote Her in the latter Torah: sacred negative commandments, |
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And this is the brideprice that the bride brought in — to go up and be revealed |
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The sum total between the marriage-writ, the brideprice, and their sought honor, |
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And the groom has wished to merit Israel His alloted people, and raise them these riches of the fruit put forth freely, For if it is loss, the loss is His, and if it is profit, the profit is His. (Tosefta Bava Metzia 4:20) |
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And the groom has received on Himself the text of this marriage-writ, To be paid back from all the valuable wealth that no human would ever enjoy Crushing the head over a wide land. (Psalms 110:6) |
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And the pair received stipulations, all fair in writ, that they would gather, gather, Every one of them, when they would long for Court stipulations, from beginning to end. |
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Her handiwork is his, and to him are all her decorations. His song is with her at night, and in the day a thread of grace drawn over her. Give her her usufruct, and praise her deeds in the gates. (Proverbs 31:31) |
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And the inheritance per the customary law and practice is inscribed on stone, From goodness stored for the righteous that no eye has seen. Let us go up, go up and inherit it! (Numbers 13:30) |
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And the dwelling is the Torah, in the corner her dwelling; All who want to take should take her profit and hire— And from the desert to the Giving. (Numbers 21:18) |
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That a man not take another wife from the children of the twisted gentiles, Only to a dandled daughter should he cling, taking in heart and sight. For this will be called Woman, for from man she was taken.(Genesis 2:23) |
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And that he should not forsake her from rage and negligence, Nor eat the bread of laziness with her. To engage in wise conduct and to grasp foolishness. (Ecclesiastes 2:3) |
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And that he should not seize her treasured objects, nor sell them, Rather, he should remember always to increase books. Purchase truth, and do not sell it. (Proverbs 23:23) |
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And that he should not go out to a distant place or set his path on the sea, But let the book of Teaching rest by his heart, And it will be with him and he will read it.(Deuteronomy 17:19) |
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And all these stipulations are set and established, Marked like the celestial host of heavens, Forever and ever and from eternity to eternity. |
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And the Groom swore to fulfill every word for His multitude, To let His beloveds and those who do His will inherit substance. |
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And the Groom has acquired five acquisitions, And among them are Teaching, Testimony, and betrothed Treasure, and He shall bring out the keystone. (Zechariah 4:7) |
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The righteous will see and rejoice and eat their fruits, In testimony longer than the earth in measure and wider than the sea. |
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And He raised testimony in Jacob and teaching there in Israel in strength And said to raise her borders that no breacher could breach. So I may call trusted witnesses to witness— the heavens and earth. (Deuteronomy 30:19) |
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Let the Groom rejoice in the bride He took as His lot, And let the bride’s heart rejoice in her young Groom, and say to His praise: |
This is the most common Ketubah l'Shavuot read in Sephardi communities. There are others, including those written by R' David Pardo, R' Habib Toledano, R' Raphael Moshe Albaz, and R' Yosef Mashash,
ב ______ בשבת ______ לחדש ______ שנת חמשת אלפים ושבע מאות ______ לבריאת העולם למנין שאנו מנין כאן ______ איך החתן ______ בר ______ אמר לה להדא ______ בת ______ הוי לי לאנתו כדת משה וישראל ואנא אפלח ואוקיר ואיזון ואפרנס יתיכי ליכי כהלכות גוברין יהודאין דפלחין ומוקרין וזנין ומפרנסין לנשיהון בקושטא ויהיבנא ליכי מהר ______ כסף זוזי ______ דחזי ליכי מדאוריתא ומזוניכי וכסותיכי וסיפוקיכי ומיעל לותיכי כאורח כל ארעא וצביאת מרת ______ דא והות ליה לאנתו ודן נדוניא דהנעלת ליה מבי ______ בין בכסף בין בדהב בין בתכשיטין במאני דלבושא בשימושי דירה ובשימושא דערסא הכל קבל עליו ______ חתן דנן ______ זקוקים כסף צרוף וצבי ______ חתן דנן והוסיף לה מן דיליה עוד ______ זקוקים כסף צרוף אחרים כנגדן סך הכל ______ זקוקים כסף צרוף וכך אמר ______ חתן דנן אחריות שטר כתובתא דא נדוניא דן ותוספתא דא קבלית עלי ועל ירתי בתראי להתפרע מכל שפר ארג נכסין וקנינין דאית לי תחות כל שמיא דקנאי ודעתיד אנא למקנא נכסין דאית להון אחריות ודלית להון אחריות כלהון יהון אחראין וערבאין לפרוע מנהון שטר כתובתא דא נדוניא דן ותוספתא דא מנאי ואפילו מן גלימא דעל כתפאי בחיי ובתר חיי מן יומא דנן ולעלם ואחריות שטר כתובתא דא נדוניא דן ותוספתא דא קבל עליו ______ חתן דנן כחומר כל שטרי כתובות ותוספתות דנהגין בבנות ישראל העשויין כתקון חכמינו זכרונם לברכה דלא כאסמכתא ודלא כטופסי דשטרי וקנינא מן ______ בר ______ חתן דנן למרת ______ בת ______ דא על כל מה דכתוב ומפורש לעיל במנא דכשר למקניא ביה והכל שריר וקים
Rabbinical Council of America Ketubah Text
On the [day] in the week, in the [name of] month, the year, 57[decade] from the creation of the world, according to the count that we are counting here [place], [groom] the son of [father] said to this [marital status, bride] the daughter of [father], "Be my wife, according to the law of Moses and Israel. And I will work to honor, feed, support and maintain you, according to the laws of Jewish men, who faithfully work to honor, feed and support their wives. And I will give you [bride's marital status] silver zuz [amount], which is due to you; and your food, clothing and needs and to live with you in the manner of the whole world." And Miss [bride] here agreed and became his wife. And this dowry that she brought in to him from the house of [father/herself] whether in silver, in gold, in jewelry, in clothing apparel, in houseware or in bedclothes - our groom has assumed upon himself for [amount] pieces of refined silver. And our groom [groom] agreed and added another [amount] pieces of refined silver from his own corresponding to them - all in all [amount] pieces of refined silver. And our groom [groom] said as follows, "I accept responsibility upon myself and upon my inheritors after me for this marriage contract, for this dowry and for this addition, to be paid from all the best of my properties and possessions under all the skies, that I have acquired or that I will acquire in the future. Whether they are properties that are liened or are not liened, they are all liable and guarantee payment of this marriage contract, this dowry and this addition from me - and even from the cloak on my shoulder. [This holds] during my lifetime and after my lifetime, from today and forever." And our groom [groom] has accepted responsibility and the stringencies of this marriage contract, this dowry and this addition, in accordance with the stringencies of all marriage contracts, dowries and additions customary with regards to the daughters of Israel that are made according to the ordinance of our Sages, may their memory be blessed. This is not like a conjectural agreement nor like a contract template. And it has been validated by our groom [groom] the son of [father] towards [bride] the daughter of [father] here about everything that is written and specified above with an object fit to make such a validation (kinyan). It is all binding and established.
What does the ketubbah tell us about social structures? We learn from it that a married woman is dependent upon her husband and needs to have her rights protected. No ketubbah is written for him, not because he has fewer rights, but because he had, in the past, all the rights and resources. He alone makes promises to her, whereas she makes none to him. So even though the ketubbah guaranteed many rights that women would not have had otherwise, still, the married woman’s need to have a ketubbah drawn up for her indicated, very clearly, that she was under her husband’s thumb: He controlled all the finances and could dole them out to her as he saw fit.
I do want it to become legally insufficient for only the groom to give a ring and betroth the bride. I want both bride and groom to betroth one another and for both actions to be necessary in order for kiddushin to be legally binding. This desire is not only because of a wish for reciprocity of action. When both bride and groom betroth one another, it radically changes the nature of the ownership metaphor that is an inextricable aspect of kiddushin. Marriage is one of the deepest forms of ownership, the acquisition of another person’s sexual and emotional being. In its ancient formulation, kiddushin grants unilateral ownership. But bilateral kiddushin changes the picture. Now, each person freely grants ownership of himself or herself and, in return, freely accepts ownership of another person. Instead of patriarchal possession, we move to a deep and reciprocal obligation and responsibility
Acquisition was not the real basis for family relationships, but it served as a metaphor for a pattern of interdependence and responsibility. It was a way of visualizing a pattern of reciprocal relationships, and until recently, the social pattern in which Jews lived privileged males. There is now a new social understanding and a new socio-economic reality... Kiddushin, in this understanding, is an act of Jewish marriage that can be initiated only by a man because an act of purchase is unidirectional. By contrast, I argue that the roots of Jewish marriage are to be found in a mutual agreement and that the traditional conceptualization of kiddushin in which the husband had to take the initiative originates in a society that privileged males. In an egalitarian society, kiddushin is reconceptualized... The way our halakhah responds to this new social understanding is one more example of the vitality of Jewish religious life and of our love for God and Torah.
ב____ בשבת ב_____לחודש _____שנת חמשת אלפים שבע מאות ______ לבריאת עולם למנין שאנו כאן ב_____ במדינת ____
אנו עדים שהחתן ____ בן ___ לבית אמר לה לכלה____ בת ____ לבית ____ היקוק לי לאשה כדת משה וישראל ואני אעבוד עבורך ואכבד ואזון ואפרנס אותך כמשפט גברים יהודיים העובדים עבור נשותיהם ומכבדים וזנים ומפרנסים אותן באמונה. ואתן לך כסף כתובתך מאתים זוזים הראוי לך מן התורה ומזונותיך וכסותיך וסיפוקיך ואחיה חיי משפחה אתך כדרך כל־העולם.
והכלה _____בת ____ אמרה לחתן ____ בן ____ היה לי לאיש כדת משה וישראל ואני אעבוד עבורך ואכבד ואזון ואפרנס אותך כמשפט נשים יהודיות העובדות עבור אנשיהן ומכבדות וזנות ומפרנסות את אנשיהם באמונה. ואתן לך כסף כתובתך מאתים זוזים הראוי לך מדברי חכמים ומזונותיך וכסותיך וסיפוקיך ואחיה חיי משפחה אתך כדרך כל־העולם.
סך הכל ארבע מאות זוזים. ישלטו בנכסיהם שווה בשווה וכך אמרו____ בן _____ החתן ו______ בת ____ הכלה אחריות שטר כתובה זאת קבלנו עלינו ועל יורשינו אחרינו להיפרע מכל־מיטב חמדת נכסים וקנינים שיש לנו תחת כל־השמים שזכינו בקנינם ושעתיד אנו לזכות בקנינם, נכסים שיש להם אחריות ושאין להם אחריות, כולם יהיו אחראים וערבים לפרוע מהם שטר כתובה זה ממנו ואפלו מן הגלימה שעל כתפינו, בחיינו ולאחר מותינו, מיום זה ולעולם. ואחריות וחומר שטר כתבה זה קיבלו עליהם ______ בן ____ החתן ו______ בת ____ הכלה כחומר כול־שטרי כתובות שנוהגים בבית ישראל העשויים כתיקון חכמינו זכרונם לברכה.
התחייבו ____ בן ____ החתן ו____ בת ____ הכלה הדדית לבנות בית בישראל בו ישרו אהבה ואחווה שלום ורעות. והסכימו _____ בן ____ החתן ו____ בת ____ הכלה שאם יעלה על לב אחד מהם לבקש ניתוק קשר הנשואין שלהם, או אם כבר נותק קשר הנישואין שלהם בערכאות המדינה, שיוכל זה או זו להזמין את־הזולת לבית הדין של כנסת הרבנים או בא־כוחו, ושיציתו שניהם לפסק־דינו כדי לאפשר לשניהם לחיות לפי דיני התורה. לא כאסמכתא ולא כטופסי שטרות. וקבלנו קנין מן ____ בן _____ התן ל_____ בת ____ הכלה ומן ____ בת ____ הכלה לחתן ____ בן ____ על כל־מה שכתוב ומפורש לעיל בכלי הכשר לעשות בו קנין, והכול שריר וקים.
Rabbi Pamela Barmash CJLS Egalitarian Ketubah (2020)
We testify that on the [number] day of the week, the [number] day of the month of [month], in the year five thousand seven hundred [year], corresponding to the [number] day of [month], [year], here in [place] in the country of [country]:
The groom, [groom] the son of [parents] of the family of [surname], said to the bride, [bride] the daughter of [parents] of the family [surname]: “Be my wife according to the laws and traditions of Moses and the Jewish people. I will work on your behalf and honor, sustain, and support you according to the practice of Jewish men, who faithfully work on behalf of their wives and honor, sustain and support them. I obligate myself to give you the sum of 200 zuzim as the money for your ketubah, to which you are entitled according to biblical law. I will provide your food, clothing and necessities, and I will live with you in marital relations according to universal custom.”
And the bride [bride] the daughter of [parents] said to the groom [groom] the son of [parents]: “Be my husband according to the laws and traditions of Moses and the Jewish people. I will work on your behalf and honor, sustain, and support you according to the practice of Jewish women, who faithfully work on behalf of their husbands and honor, sustain and support them. I obligate myself to give you the sum of 200 zuzim as the money for your ketubah, to which you are entitled according to rabbinic law. I will provide your food, clothing and necessities, and I will live with you in marital relations according to universal custom.”
For a total of 400 zuzim. They will control their property equally. The groom [groom], and the bride [bride] said: “We take upon ourselves, and our heirs after us, the obligation of this ketubah to be paid from the best part of all our property, real and personal, that we now possess or may hereafter acquire. From this day forward, all our property, wherever it may be, even the mantle on our backs, shall be mortgaged and liened for the payment of this ketubah, whether during our lifetime or thereafter.” [groom], the groom, and [bride], the bride, took upon themselves all the obligations and strictures of this ketubah, as is customary with other ketubot made for Jewish men and women in accordance with the enactment of our sages, may their memory be for a blessing.
[groom] the son of [parents], the groom, and [bride] the daughter of [parents], the bride, agreed to build a house in which love and companionship, peace and friendship will abide. [groom] the son of [parents], the groom, and [bride] the daughter of [parents], the bride, further agreed that should either contemplate dissolution of the marriage, or following the dissolution of their marriage in the civil courts, each may summon the other to the Bet Din of The Rabbinical Assembly, or its representative, and that each will abide by its instructions so that throughout life each will be able to live according to the laws of the Torah. This ketubah is not to be regarded as mere rhetoric or as a perfunctory legal form. We have performed the act which in Jewish law makes the obligations of this document legally binding on the part of [groom], the groom, to [bride], the bride, and on the part of the bride, [bride], to [groom], the groom, with an instrument fit for that purpose, in order to confirm all that is stated and specified above, which shall be valid and immediately effective
One particularly glaring practical problem flows from the nature of unilateral marriage through kiddushin: it is directly tied to the legal nature of divorce. Because marriage is structured as a unilateral form of acquisition, it is the acquirer i.e., the husband, who must relinquish his acquisition.... Kiddushin thus presents a challenge to those seeking a more egalitarian expression of Jewish law and ritual, both in a practical way as just outlined and on a more foundational level in that marriage by a unilateral act and metaphors of ownership is not a model that can comfortably fit with a modern understand of marriage as a partnership of equals... There is a growing population for whom kiddushin is simply not a model that can be made to comfortably fit with ideals of equal and egalitarian commitments and obligations between life-partners.
If reshaping traditional nonegalitarian practices cannot take place, whether in regard to marriage or other concepts, rituals, and mitzvot, then we have come to a roadblock, indeed a cul-de-sac, that will send us back a century.
I hold that the basic concept of marriage was bilateral and equal and that the social structure of Israelite and ancient Jewish society shaped it into being a relationship in which the groom/husband played the primary role. Rabbi Labovitz holds that the concept itself was originally unequal and, therefore, cannot be redeemed and must be abandoned completely because it is basically an unequal mode of acquisition and it has operated historically as such. I disagree sharply, and part of my disagreement stems from my knowledge and research into marriage and marriage contracts that were in use long before rabbis and indeed long before the ancient Israelites. The ketubbah used among Jews and ancient Israelites for which we have documentation for as long as 2500 years ago is a special form of a general bilateral contract. In the social and legal circumstances in which it developed, the position of the groom was generally favored over that of the bride. The ketubbah developed from a bilateral contract into a special contract for marriage in which the husband’s privileged role in society meant that the husband took the initiative and the wife had to be protected in case of divorce or widowhood. Those socio-economic circumstances shaped the ketubbah, and it is not the ketubbah and kiddushin that shaped those socio-economic circumstances.
On the sixth day of the month of Sivan in the year 2446 since creation of the world at the foot of Mt. Sinai, we witnesses testify that the groom, the King of kings, said to the bride, the People of Israel, “Be my wife according to the laws of Moses and Israel. And I will honor and support you and maintain you, and I will make of you a great nation (Genesis 12:2). I will renew your souls, guide you in the right path, and provide you comfort amidst fear (Psalms 23:3). I will be your guardian and your protection at your right hand, without rest nor sleeping (Psalm 121:5). I obligate to you the enduring perfect Torah, which renews life and makes the simple wise (Psalms 19:8).
And the bride, the People of Israel, said to the Groom, the King of kings, “Be my husband according to the laws of Moses and Israel. And I will honor and support you and praise your name. I will keep your covenant and be a light unto the nations (Isaiah 49:6). I will work and protect your earth, remember and guard your Shabbat, and impress your teachings upon the generations. I obligate to you adherence to the 248 positive commandments and 365 negative commandments.
The Groom, the King of kings, and the Bride, the People of Israel, agreed to build a world in which love and companionship, peace and friendship will abide. They agreed to see holiness in one another and act accordingly, be compassionate and gracious, slow to anger, abounding in kindness, faithfulness and forgive iniquity as is befitting of the Jewish tradition (Exodus 34:6).
This contract shall remain in effect forever and ever. All of this is shall be valid and immediately effective.