Who Are You, Anyway? Free Will vs. Determinism & Trauma
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ShareDedicated to Cindy Fogel (z"l), mother of Rabbi Adam Fogel.
(א) וַיִּהְיוּ֙ חַיֵּ֣י שָׂרָ֔ה מֵאָ֥ה שָׁנָ֛ה וְעֶשְׂרִ֥ים שָׁנָ֖ה וְשֶׁ֣בַע שָׁנִ֑ים שְׁנֵ֖י חַיֵּ֥י שָׂרָֽה׃
(1) Sarah’s lifetime—the span of Sarah’s life—came to one hundred and twenty-seven years.
She was married off, barren, taken on journeys, and desired for her beauty. She was given to Pharaoh, then returned with her husband and property. She gave her handmaid to her husband, who got pregnant, and later abused the handmaid. She received a promise, laughed (and denied it), gave birth, expelled her handmaid, and died.
What did it mean to be Sarah? What was her life like? And whose life was it, anyway?
(ט) וַתֵּ֨רֶא שָׂרָ֜ה אֶֽת־בֶּן־הָגָ֧ר הַמִּצְרִ֛ית אֲשֶׁר־יָלְדָ֥ה לְאַבְרָהָ֖ם מְצַחֵֽק׃ (י) וַתֹּ֙אמֶר֙ לְאַבְרָהָ֔ם גָּרֵ֛שׁ הָאָמָ֥ה הַזֹּ֖את וְאֶת־בְּנָ֑הּ כִּ֣י לֹ֤א יִירַשׁ֙ בֶּן־הָאָמָ֣ה הַזֹּ֔את עִם־בְּנִ֖י עִם־יִצְחָֽק׃
(9) Sarah saw the son whom Hagar the Egyptian had borne to Abraham playing. (10) She said to Abraham, “Cast out that slave-woman and her son, for the son of that slave shall not share in the inheritance with my son Isaac.”
וַיְהִ֗י כִּ֣י אָֽרְכוּ־ל֥וֹ שָׁם֙ הַיָּמִ֔ים וַיַּשְׁקֵ֗ף אֲבִימֶ֙לֶךְ֙ מֶ֣לֶךְ פְּלִשְׁתִּ֔ים בְּעַ֖ד הַֽחַלּ֑וֹן וַיַּ֗רְא וְהִנֵּ֤ה יִצְחָק֙ מְצַחֵ֔ק אֵ֖ת רִבְקָ֥ה אִשְׁתּֽוֹ׃
Translation removed. Look for the bolded word in Hebrew above and beside, and consider the question below.
What was so terrible about the "son of Hagar" that he and his mother were cast off? There are several possibilities here using the key word, some more terrible than others.
וּמֵתָה שָׂרָה מֵאוֹתוֹ צַעַר, לְפִיכָךְ נִסְמְכָה עֲקֵדָה לְוַיִּהְיוּ חַיֵּי שָׂרָה.
Sarah died as a result of grief over [the binding of Isaac]. That is why the binding [of Isaac] is juxtaposed to “Sarah’s lifetime was.”
Consider the family dynamic here. What would the "car ride home" been like for Avraham and Isaac? What clues do we have (not mentioned here) that make the original story more shocking? See Rabbi Tzemah Yoreh's work on this.
Parallels Between Abraham and Isaac
- Marriage to a Barren Wife (Genesis 11:30; 25:21)
- Claiming Their Wife Is Their Sister (Genesis 12:10-20; 20:1-18; 26:6-11).
- Famine and Sojourning (above)
- Conflict Over Wells (Genesis 21:25-34); 26:12-22).
- Divine Covenant (Genesis 15, 17; 26:2-5).
- Divine Blessing Through Offspring (Genesis 22:18; 26:4).
- Sending a Son Away (Genesis 21:9-14; 28:1)
Sarah's life and her daughter in law Rivka's life (just a few parallels)...
- Barren for Many Years: Sarah (Genesis 18:10-14); Rebekah (Genesis 25:21).
- Favoritism Toward the Younger Son: Sarah: (Genesis 21:10-12); Rebekah: (Genesis 27:5-17).
- Beauty Leading to Potential Danger: Sarah: (Genesis 12:11-20; Genesis 20:1-18); Rebekah: (Genesis 26:6-11)
(א) וַיֹּ֤אמֶר יְהֹוָה֙ אֶל־אַבְרָ֔ם לֶךְ־לְךָ֛ מֵאַרְצְךָ֥ וּמִמּֽוֹלַדְתְּךָ֖ וּמִבֵּ֣ית אָבִ֑יךָ אֶל־הָאָ֖רֶץ אֲשֶׁ֥ר אַרְאֶֽךָּ׃
(1) יהוה said to Abram, “Go forth from your native land and from your father’s house to the land that I will show you.
In what way is your life a parallel to others? How is it something completely different? What is the drastic symbolism of the "father's house"?
(ב) וַתָּ֣מׇת שָׂרָ֗ה בְּקִרְיַ֥ת אַרְבַּ֛ע הִ֥וא חֶבְר֖וֹן בְּאֶ֣רֶץ כְּנָ֑עַן וַיָּבֹא֙ אַבְרָהָ֔ם לִסְפֹּ֥ד לְשָׂרָ֖ה וְלִבְכֹּתָֽהּ׃ (ג) וַיָּ֙קׇם֙ אַבְרָהָ֔ם מֵעַ֖ל פְּנֵ֣י מֵת֑וֹ וַיְדַבֵּ֥ר אֶל־בְּנֵי־חֵ֖ת לֵאמֹֽר׃ (ד) גֵּר־וְתוֹשָׁ֥ב אָנֹכִ֖י עִמָּכֶ֑ם תְּנ֨וּ לִ֤י אֲחֻזַּת־קֶ֙בֶר֙ עִמָּכֶ֔ם וְאֶקְבְּרָ֥ה מֵתִ֖י מִלְּפָנָֽי׃
(2) Sarah died in Kiriath-arba—now Hebron—in the land of Canaan; and Abraham proceeded to mourn for Sarah and to bewail her. (3) Then Abraham rose from beside his dead, and spoke to the Hittites, saying, (4) “I am a resident alien among you; sell me a burial site among you, that I may remove my dead for burial.”
Who is Abraham in this series of pesukim? And how is he defined? And under what conditions? To what degree are you defined in the same way?
(סז) וַיְבִאֶ֣הָ יִצְחָ֗ק הָאֹ֙הֱלָה֙ שָׂרָ֣ה אִמּ֔וֹ וַיִּקַּ֧ח אֶת־רִבְקָ֛ה וַתְּהִי־ל֥וֹ לְאִשָּׁ֖ה וַיֶּאֱהָבֶ֑הָ וַיִּנָּחֵ֥ם יִצְחָ֖ק אַחֲרֵ֥י אִמּֽוֹ׃ {פ}
(67) Isaac then brought her into the tent of his mother Sarah, and he took Rebekah as his wife. Isaac loved her, and thus found comfort after his mother’s death.
וינחם יצחק אחרי אמו אחרי שהיתה דומה לאמו במעשיה.
וינחם יצחק אחרי אמו, Now Yitzchok became comforted, (came to terms with) the death of his mother when he saw that his wife possessed the virtues his mother had been famous for.
What does this say about Isaac or Rivka and the people they are? Is this a "fair" way to treat someone?
מֵהָכָא: ״וַיְבִאֶהָ יִצְחָק הָאֹהֱלָה שָׂרָה אִמּוֹ, וַיִּקַּח אֶת רִבְקָה וַתְּהִי לוֹ לְאִשָּׁה וַיֶּאֱהָבֶהָ, וַיִּנָּחֵם יִצְחָק אַחֲרֵי אִמּוֹ״, וּכְתִיב בָּתְרֵיהּ: ״וַיֹּסֶף אַבְרָהָם וַיִּקַּח אִשָּׁה וּשְׁמָהּ קְטוּרָה״.
....As it is written: “And Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah’s tent, and took Rebekah, and she became his wife; and he loved her, and Isaac was comforted for his mother” (Genesis 24:67). And it is written immediately afterward: “And Abraham took another wife, and her name was Keturah” (Genesis 25:1). After seeing his son marry, Abraham was disquieted by the fact he was not married. This is akin to one who sees another eating and does not eat.
And finally -- is there free will or not?