Shemini 5786 - Diligently Inquire About the Deaths of Children
Children dying by violence in today's world: how do we respond?
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Few events in life are as universally devastating as the deaths of one's children, or the ancitipation of their death. In the normal flow of life, we do not imagine that our children will predecease us.

(א) וַיִּרְגַּ֣ז הַמֶּ֗לֶךְ וַיַּ֛עַל עַל־עֲלִיַּ֥ת הַשַּׁ֖עַר וַיֵּ֑בְךְּ וְכֹ֣ה ׀ אָמַ֣ר בְּלֶכְתּ֗וֹ בְּנִ֤י אַבְשָׁלוֹם֙ בְּנִ֣י בְנִ֣י אַבְשָׁל֔וֹם מִֽי־יִתֵּ֤ן מוּתִי֙ אֲנִ֣י תַחְתֶּ֔יךָ אַבְשָׁל֖וֹם בְּנִ֥י בְנִֽי׃

(1) The king was shaken. He went up to the upper chamber of the gateway and wept, moaning these words as he went, “My son Absalom! O my son, my son Absalom! If only I had died instead of you! O Absalom, my son, my son!”

As I beging to write this commentary (Sunday 29 March 2026 | 11 Nisan 5786), I hear a news story from the BBC, from yesterday:
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The deaths of so many other children crowd into my mind...
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Sandy Hook Connecticut
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Uvalde Texas
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Sudan
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A woman mourns as she carries the shrouded body of a child killed following overnight Israeli strikes on Rafah in the southern Gaza Strip, on May 6.
https://www.opb.org/article/2024/05/15/why-the-u-n-revised-the-numbers-of-women-and-children-killed-in-gaza/
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(טו) כֹּ֣ה ׀ אָמַ֣ר יהוה ק֣וֹל בְּרָמָ֤ה נִשְׁמָע֙ נְהִי֙ בְּכִ֣י תַמְרוּרִ֔ים רָחֵ֖ל מְבַכָּ֣ה עַל־בָּנֶ֑יהָ מֵאֲנָ֛ה לְהִנָּחֵ֥ם עַל־בָּנֶ֖יהָ כִּ֥י אֵינֶֽנּוּ׃ {ס}

(15)Thus said GOD: A cry is heard in Ramah—
Wailing, bitter weeping—Rachel weeping for her children.

She refuses to be comforted for her children, who are gone.

The death of one's child, and the intense grief that follows: a universal experience.
Two of Aaron's four sons die in this week's Torah portion, Parashat Shemini. Their deaths are unique and shocking: just after Nadav and Avihu, along with their father Aaron and two brothers, have been anointed as priests, these two offer "strange" fire to God in the Temple and are instantaneously annihilated by God's fire.

(א) וַיִּקְח֣וּ בְנֵֽי־אַ֠הֲרֹ֠ן נָדָ֨ב וַאֲבִיה֜וּא אִ֣ישׁ מַחְתָּת֗וֹ וַיִּתְּנ֤וּ בָהֵן֙ אֵ֔שׁ וַיָּשִׂ֥ימוּ עָלֶ֖יהָ קְטֹ֑רֶת וַיַּקְרִ֜יבוּ לִפְנֵ֤י יהוה אֵ֣שׁ זָרָ֔ה אֲשֶׁ֧ר לֹ֦א צִוָּ֖ה אֹתָֽם׃ (ב) וַתֵּ֥צֵא אֵ֛שׁ מִלִּפְנֵ֥י יהוה וַתֹּ֣אכַל אוֹתָ֑ם וַיָּמֻ֖תוּ לִפְנֵ֥י יהוה׃

(1) Now Aaron’s sons Nadab and Abihu each took his fire pan, put fire in it, and laid incense on it; and they offered before GOD alien fire—which had not been enjoined upon them. (2) And fire came forth from GOD and consumed them; thus they died by GOD’s will.

There are millenia of commentary exploring the ambiguity of their action and God's reaction; these are not the focus of my exploration today. Rather, I propose to weave together the human dimensions of these events and the two words - in this week's parsha - that are at the precise center of the Torah, by word count.
Aaron and his surviving two sons, in a state of shock, do not proceed with the required sacrifices and practices; Moses sees that the temple rites have not been "properly" carried out after his nephews' deaths, becomes angry, and angrily demands to know why. Aaron will reply in what is, on my reading, a profoundly simple, quiet, human moment of parental grief. We will come to Aaron's response shortly.
Fisrt, Moses' angry inquiry into the aberration from the correct order of rites, which includes the midpoint (in word count - highlighted here) of the entire Torah:

(טז) וְאֵ֣ת ׀ שְׂעִ֣יר הַֽחַטָּ֗את דָּרֹ֥שׁ דָּרַ֛שׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה וְהִנֵּ֣ה שֹׂרָ֑ף וַ֠יִּקְצֹ֠ף עַל־אֶלְעָזָ֤ר וְעַל־אִֽיתָמָר֙ בְּנֵ֣י אַהֲרֹ֔ן הַנּוֹתָרִ֖ם לֵאמֹֽר׃ (יז) מַדּ֗וּעַ לֹֽא־אֲכַלְתֶּ֤ם אֶת־הַחַטָּאת֙ בִּמְק֣וֹם הַקֹּ֔דֶשׁ כִּ֛י קֹ֥דֶשׁ קׇֽדָשִׁ֖ים הִ֑וא וְאֹתָ֣הּ ׀ נָתַ֣ן לָכֶ֗ם לָשֵׂאת֙ אֶת־עֲוֺ֣ן הָעֵדָ֔ה לְכַפֵּ֥ר עֲלֵיהֶ֖ם לִפְנֵ֥י יהוה׃ (יח) הֵ֚ן לֹא־הוּבָ֣א אֶת־דָּמָ֔הּ אֶל־הַקֹּ֖דֶשׁ פְּנִ֑ימָה אָכ֨וֹל תֹּאכְל֥וּ אֹתָ֛הּ בַּקֹּ֖דֶשׁ כַּאֲשֶׁ֥ר צִוֵּֽיתִי׃

(16) Then Moses diligently inquired about the goat of purgation offering, and it had already been burned! He was angry with Eleazar and Ithamar, Aaron’s remaining sons, and said, (17) “Why did you not eat the purgation offering in the sacred area? For it is most holy, and it is what was given to you to remove the guilt of the community and to make expiation for them before GOD. (18) Since its blood was not brought inside the sanctuary, you should certainly have eaten it in the sanctuary, as I commanded.”

The doubling of the verb דרש indicates a strong emphasis: Moses' inquiry is most emphatic, diligent: דָּרֹ֥שׁ דָּרַ֛שׁ מֹשֶׁ֖ה. I have long treasured the presence of these two words in the very center of our treasured Torah. This is a fundament of the Jewish tradition of diligently questioning: interrogating and exploring texts, ethics, justice and injustice.
This verbal root √דרש has an interesting array of meanings and aspects which are part of "asking", suggestive of a process of asking or inquiring. This includes aspects of treading - in other words, this action is something that we do repeatedly (such as deeply studying our texts), seeking out the sacred inner sacred meanings dwelling in our texts.g
For example:

(ה) וּמִזְבַּ֣ח הַנְּחֹ֗שֶׁת אֲשֶׁ֤ר עָשָׂה֙ בְּצַלְאֵל֙ בֶּן־אוּרִ֣י בֶן־ח֔וּר שָׁ֕ם לִפְנֵ֖י מִשְׁכַּ֣ן יהוה וַיִּדְרְשֵׁ֥הוּ שְׁלֹמֹ֖ה וְהַקָּהָֽל׃

(5) The bronze altar, which Bezalel son of Uri son of Hur had made, was also there before the Tabernacle of GOD, and Solomon and the congregation sought it out [made their way to it].

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Moses' strong insistence on adhering with the rules of sacrifice collides with the most fundamental parental feelings of loss that Aaron is experiencing.
Aaron's response to his brother humanizes his imponderable loss:

(יט) וַיְדַבֵּ֨ר אַהֲרֹ֜ן אֶל־מֹשֶׁ֗ה הֵ֣ן הַ֠יּ֠וֹם הִקְרִ֨יבוּ אֶת־חַטָּאתָ֤ם וְאֶת־עֹֽלָתָם֙ לִפְנֵ֣י יהוה וַתִּקְרֶ֥אנָה אֹתִ֖י כָּאֵ֑לֶּה וְאָכַ֤לְתִּי חַטָּאת֙ הַיּ֔וֹם הַיִּיטַ֖ב בְּעֵינֵ֥י יהוה׃

(כ) וַיִּשְׁמַ֣ע מֹשֶׁ֔ה וַיִּיטַ֖ב בְּעֵינָֽיו׃ {פ}

(19) And Aaron spoke to Moses, “See, this day they brought their purgation offering and their burnt offering before GOD, and such things have befallen me! Had I eaten purgation offering today, would GOD have approved?”

(20) And when Moses heard this, he approved.

וַתִּקְרֶאנָה אֹתִי ...such things have befallen me...
Moses is a father too.
For years I have sought understanding of the subject of Moses' diligent inquiry: why isn't he dilingently inquiring about the strange death of his nephews? This is similar to my taking issue with the denoument of Abraham's "argument" with God in Parashat Vayera; my argument there is that Abraham did not go far enough in his arguing with God against collective punishment for Sodom and Gomorrah (please see my Sefaria commentary on this topic, Vayera 5785 Abraham and Collective Punishment | The Innocent Along With the Guilty)
I argue that Moses has it wrong in Leviticus 10:16; he should be dilingently inquiring about why Nadav and Avihu have been killed. He should be persistently inquiring into the cause their death - not only in order to better console his brother Aaron, but also in order to understand the causative factors, and thus act preventively.
This year, at this season - late March /early April 2026, Nisan 5786 (before and during Pesach, as I am writing this) wars and violence are raging in so many parts of the world, and so many are children suffering and dying as a result. Thus I am moved to focus on the topic of the death of children and the necessity to explore, interrogate, and diligently inquire as to the causes of the deaths of children, as well as to diligently inquire into what each of us could do to intervene.
In the US, a leading causes of child mortality is deaths due to firearms; U.S. children and adolescents face a 15 times greater risk of death from firearms compared to peers in other nations.
Current Causes of Death in Children and Adolescents in the United StatesPublished April 20, 2022 The New England Journal of Medicine
"The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) recently released updated official mortality data that showed 45,222 firearm-related deaths in the United States in 2020 — a new peak. Although previous analyses have shown increases in firearm-related mortality in recent years (2015 to 2019), as compared with the relatively stable rates from earlier years (1999 to 2014) these new data show a sharp 13.5% increase in the crude rate of firearm-related death from 2019 to 2020. This change was driven largely by firearm homicides, which saw a 33.4% increase in the crude rate from 2019 to 2020....increasing firearm-related mortality reflects a longer-term trend and shows that we continue to fail to protect our youth from a preventable cause of death."
Deaths of children in conflict areas:
'Not the new normal’ – 2024 ‘one of the worst years in UNICEF’s history’ for children in conflict
“By almost every measure, 2024 has been one of the worst years on record for children in conflict in UNICEF’s history—both in terms of the number of children affected and the level of impact on their lives. A child growing up in a conflict zone is far more likely to be out of school, malnourished, or forced from their home—too often repeatedly—compared to a child living in places of peace. This must not be the new normal. We cannot allow a generation of children to become collateral damage to the world’s unchecked wars.” - UNICEF Executive Director Catherine Russell.
Child mortality following armed conflict: how long does it take to reduce to pre-conflict level?
"The victims of today’s wars are civilians, the majority of whom are women and children, as recent armed conflicts have shown. From 7 October 2023 to January 2025, over 47 000 people, including about 18 000 children, were killed by the Israeli military as a result of traumatic injuries in the Gaza Strip, according to the official Palestinian Ministry of Health. It is estimated that a further 50% of these deaths are unaccounted for due to situations where entire families are killed simultaneously, leaving no one to report, or where an unknown number of people die in the collapse of a large building and are buried without going through a morgue."
Violent and non-violent death tolls for the Gaza conflict: new primary evidence from a population-representative field survey - The Lancet, Global Health, February 18, 2026
"Background
High-quality mortality estimates are crucial for understanding the human cost of conflict. The Gaza Ministry of Health (MoH) has provided regular updates to their violent death toll for the Gaza Strip following Oct 7, 2023, but these reports have attracted both criticism and support. Independent estimates of both violent and non-violent deaths were needed.
Methods
We conducted a population-representative household survey, the Gaza Mortality Survey, between Dec 30, 2024, and Jan 5, 2025. We surveyed 2000 households across 200 primary sampling units, documenting the vital status of 9729 household members as of Oct 6, 2023, plus newborns. The sample was stratified by dwelling type and Governorate of origin. We used raking procedures to adjust for demographic characteristics and calculated confidence intervals using Taylor series linearisation. Sampling occurred in accessible areas, with displaced populations representing inaccessible Governorates.
Findings
We estimated 75 200 violent deaths (95% CI 63 600–86 800) between Oct 7, 2023, and Jan 5, 2025, representing approximately 3·4% of the Gaza Strip's pre-conflict population. Women, children (ie, younger than 18 years), and older people (ie, older than 64 years) comprised 56·2% (95% CI 50·4–61·9) of violent deaths, totalling 42 200 deaths (95% CI 33 100–51 300). We also estimated 16 300 non-violent deaths (12 300–20 200), of which 8540 (4540–12 500) represent excess deaths above pre-conflict projections. The MoH figure for this period (49 090 violent deaths) was 34·7% below our central estimate."
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Shajareh Tayyebeh (in Minab, Iran) primary school pupils Sobhan Ahmadi, Arya Bahadori, Zahra Behroozi
I am completing this commentary on 6 April 2026 | 19 Nisan 5786, Day V of Chol ha'Moed Pesach, Day 4 of the Counting of the Omer - נֶצַח שֶׁבְּחֶסֶד Netzach sh'b' Chesed, Endurance within Lovingkindness. At this season, during Pesach, as we honor and remember the experience of coming forth from oppression and slavery into a state of full humanity and possibilities, let us ask ourselves, again and again, how it is that we forget that all people deserve the same fullness of their humanity.
At this time of rampant hatred, violence, war, and the deaths of children in so many ways, including in acts of collective punishment, let us each search repeatedly to discover ways that we can participate in the repair of these tragic deaths. Let us each participate in דָּרֹ֥שׁ דָּרַ֛שׁ (derosh derash). Let us each search diligently for explanations and solutions to these profoundly disturbing problems. May we be suffused with the energy of this fourth day of the Omer, netzach within chesed, to persist and endure in our questioning injustice and seeking solutions to these urgent existential problems.

(טו) הֲֽלֹא־בַ֭בֶּטֶן עֹשֵׂ֣נִי עָשָׂ֑הוּ וַ֝יְכֻנֶ֗נּוּ בָּרֶ֥חֶם אֶחָֽד׃

(15)Did not the One who made me in my mother’s belly make him?Did not One form us both in the womb?

(לד) כְּאֶזְרָ֣ח מִכֶּם֩ יִהְיֶ֨ה לָכֶ֜ם הַגֵּ֣ר ׀ הַגָּ֣ר אִתְּכֶ֗ם וְאָהַבְתָּ֥ לוֹ֙ כָּמ֔וֹךָ כִּֽי־גֵרִ֥ים הֱיִיתֶ֖ם בְּאֶ֣רֶץ מִצְרָ֑יִם אֲנִ֖י יהוה אֱלֹהֵיכֶֽם׃

(34) The strangers who reside with you shall be to you as your citizens; you shall love each one as yourself, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt: I the ETERNAL am your God.

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