Women's Torah Study: Chava👩‍👦‍👦
What do we know about "The First Woman"?
  1. What do we know about Chava
  2. What does "ezer kenegdo" actually mean?
  3. Why is Chava active and Adam passive?
  4. Why is Chava given a family punishment for an agriculture crime?

(כו) וַיֹּ֣אמֶר אֱלֹהִ֔ים נַֽעֲשֶׂ֥ה אָדָ֛ם בְּצַלְמֵ֖נוּ כִּדְמוּתֵ֑נוּ וְיִרְדּוּ֩ בִדְגַ֨ת הַיָּ֜ם וּבְע֣וֹף הַשָּׁמַ֗יִם וּבַבְּהֵמָה֙ וּבְכׇל־הָאָ֔רֶץ וּבְכׇל־הָרֶ֖מֶשׂ הָֽרֹמֵ֥שׂ עַל־הָאָֽרֶץ׃ (כז) וַיִּבְרָ֨א אֱלֹהִ֤ים ׀אֶת־הָֽאָדָם֙ בְּצַלְמ֔וֹ בְּצֶ֥לֶם אֱלֹהִ֖יםבָּרָ֣א אֹת֑וֹ זָכָ֥ר וּנְקֵבָ֖ה בָּרָ֥א אֹתָֽם׃

(26) And God said, “Let us make humankind in our image, after our likeness. They shall rule the fish of the sea, the birds of the sky, the cattle, the whole earth, and all the creeping things that creep on earth.” (27)And God created humankind in the divine image,creating it in the image of God—creating them male and female.

In this version, we have man and woman co-created.

(יח) וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהִ֔ים לֹא־ט֛וֹב הֱי֥וֹת הָֽאָדָ֖ם לְבַדּ֑וֹ אֶֽעֱשֶׂה־לּ֥וֹ עֵ֖זֶר כְּנֶגְדּֽוֹ׃

(18) The ETERNAL God said, “It is not good for the Human to be alone; I will make a fitting counterpart for him.”

תָּנוּ רַבָּנַן: יָתוֹם שֶׁבָּא לִישָּׂא — שׂוֹכְרִין לוֹ בַּיִת, וּמַצִּיעִין לוֹ מִטָּה וְכׇל כְּלֵי תַשְׁמִישׁוֹ, וְאַחַר כָּךְ מַשִּׂיאִין לוֹ אִשָּׁה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״דֵּי מַחְסוֹרוֹ אֲשֶׁר יֶחְסַר לוֹ״. ״דֵּי מַחְסוֹרוֹ״ — זֶה הַבַּיִת, ״אֲשֶׁר יֶחְסַר״ — זֶה מִטָּה וְשֻׁלְחָן, ״לוֹ״ — זוֹ אִשָּׁה. וְכֵן הוּא אוֹמֵר: ״אֶעֱשֶׂה לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ״.

The Sages taught: Concerning an orphan boy who has come to marry, the community tries its utmost to provide for all of his needs. The charities rent a house for him, arrange for him a bed and all his utensils, and thereafter they marry him a wife, as it is stated: “But you shall surely open your hand to him, and shall surely lend him sufficient for his deficiency in that which is deficient for him” (Deuteronomy 15:8). With regard to the phrase “sufficient for his deficiency,” this is referring to the house. “Which is deficient”; this is referring to a bed and table. “For him [lo]”; this is referring to a wife. And similarly the verse states: “I will make him [lo] a helpmate for him” (Genesis 2:18), when God created a wife for Adam.

אִיבַּעְיָא לְהוּ: ״מְיוּחֶדֶת לִי״ מַהוּ? ״מְיוֹעֶדֶת לִי״ מַהוּ? ״עֶזְרָתִי״ מַהוּ? ״נֶגְדָּתִי״ מַהוּ? ״עֲצוּרָתִי״ מַהוּ? ״צַלְעָתִי״ מַהוּ? ״סְגוּרָתִי״ מַהוּ? ״תַּחְתַּי״ מַהוּ? ״תְּפוּשָׂתִי״ מַהוּ? ״לְקוּחָתִי״ מַהוּ?

A dilemma was raised before the Sages: If a man betrothing a woman said: You are hereby unique to me, what is the halakha? Is this woman betrothed? Similarly, if he said to her: You are hereby designated to me, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my helper, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my counterpart, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my gathered one, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my rib, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my closed one, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby beneath me, what is the halakha? If he said: You are hereby my seized one, what is the halakha? Finally, if he said: You are hereby my taken one, what is the halakha?

גְּמָ׳ הָא יֵשׁ לוֹ בָּנִים — מִפְּרִיָּה וּרְבִיָּה בָּטֵיל, מֵאִשָּׁה לָא בָּטֵיל. מְסַיְּיעָא לֵיהּ לְרַב נַחְמָן אָמַר שְׁמוּאֵל. דְּאָמַר: אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁיֵּשׁ לוֹ לְאָדָם כַּמָּה בָּנִים, אָסוּר לַעֲמוֹד בְּלֹא אִשָּׁה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: ״לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ״.

GEMARA: The Gemara infers from the mishna’s wording that if he already has children he may neglect the mitzva to be fruitful and multiply, but he may not neglect the mitzva to have a wife. This supports what Rav Naḥman said in the name of Shmuel, who said: Even if a man has several children, it is prohibited to remain without a wife, as it is stated: “It is not good that the man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18).

אָמַר רַבִּי תַּנְחוּם אָמַר רַבִּי חֲנִילַאי: כׇּל אָדָם שֶׁאֵין לוֹ אִשָּׁה — שָׁרוּי בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה, בְּלֹא בְּרָכָה, בְּלֹא טוֹבָה. בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה, דִּכְתִיב: ״וְשָׂמַחְתָּ אַתָּה וּבֵיתֶךָ״. בְּלֹא בְּרָכָה, דִּכְתִיב: ״לְהָנִיחַ בְּרָכָה אֶל בֵּיתֶךָ״. בְּלֹא טוֹבָה, דִּכְתִיב: ״לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ״.

§ Apropos the discussion with regard to the mitzva to have children, the Gemara cites statements about marriage in general. Rabbi Tanḥum said that Rabbi Ḥanilai said: Any man who does not have a wife is left without joy, without blessing, without goodness. He proceeds to quote verses to support each part of his statement. He is without joy, as it is written: “And you shall rejoice, you and your household” (Deuteronomy 14:26), which indicates that a man is in a joyful state only when he is with his household, i.e., his wife. He is without blessing, as it is written: “To cause a blessing to rest in your house” (Ezekiel 44:30), which indicates that blessing comes through one’s house, i.e., one’s wife. He is without goodness, as it is written: “It is not good that man should be alone” (Genesis 2:18), i.e., without a wife.

וְאָמַר רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר, מַאי דִּכְתִיב ״אֶעֱשֶׂה לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ״: זָכָה — עוֹזַרְתּוֹ, לֹא זָכָה — כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. וְאִיכָּא דְּאָמְרִי: רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר רָמֵי, כְּתִיב ״כְּנַגְּדוֹ״, וְקָרֵינַן ״כְּנֶגְדּוֹ״. זָכָה — כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, לֹא זָכָה — מְנַגַּדְתּוֹ.

And Rabbi Elazar said: What is the meaning of that which is written: “I will make him a helpmate for him [kenegdo]” (Genesis 2:18)? If one is worthy his wife helps him; if he is not worthy she is against him. And some say a slightly different version: Rabbi Elazar raised a contradiction: It is written in the Torah with a spelling that allows it to be read: Striking him [kenagdo], and we read it as though it said: For him [kenegdo]. If he is worthy she is for him as his helpmate; if he is not worthy she strikes him.

(ב) לֹא טוֹב, תָּנֵי רַבִּי יַעֲקֹב כָּל שֶׁאֵין לוֹ אִשָּׁה, שָׁרוּי בְּלֹא טוֹבָה בְּלֹא עֵזֶר בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה בְּלֹא בְּרָכָה בְּלֹא כַּפָּרָה. בְּלֹא טוֹבָה, לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ. בְּלֹא עֵזֶר, אֶעֱשֶׂה לוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים יד, כו): וְשָׂמַחְתָּ אַתָּה וּבֵיתֶךָ. בְּלֹא כַפָּרָה, (ויקרא טז, יא): וְכִפֶּר בַּעֲדוֹ וּבְעַד בֵּיתוֹ. בְּלֹא בְרָכָה (יחזקאל מד, ל): לְהָנִיחַ בְּרָכָה אֶל בֵּיתֶךָ. רַבִּי סִימוֹן בְּשֵׁם רַבִּי. יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן לֵוִי אָמַר אַף בְּלֹא שָׁלוֹם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמואל א כה, ו): וְאַתָּה שָׁלוֹם וּבֵיתְךָ שָׁלוֹם. רַבִּי יְהוֹשֻׁעַ דְּסִכְנִין בְּשֵׁם רַבִּי לֵוִי אָמַר אַף בְּלֹא חַיִּים, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (קהלת ט, ט): רְאֵה חַיִּים עִם אִשָּׁה אֲשֶׁר אָהַבְתָּ. רַבִּי חִיָּא בַּר גַּמְדָא אָמַר אַף אֵינוֹ אָדָם שָׁלֵם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית ה, ב): וַיְבָרֶךְ אֹתָם וַיִּקְרָא אֶת שְׁמָם אָדָם, שְׁנֵיהֶם כְּאֶחָד קְרוּיִים אָדָם. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים אַף מְמַעֵט אֶת הַדְּמוּת, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית ט, ו): כִּי בְּצֶלֶם אֱלֹהִים עָשָׂה אֶת הָאָדָם, מַה כְּתִיב אַחֲרָיו (בראשית ט, ז): וְאַתֶּם פְּרוּ וּרְבוּ.

(ג) אֶעֱשֶׂה לוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, אִם זָכָה עֵזֶר, וְאִם לָאו כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. אָמַר רַבִּי יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בַּר נְחֶמְיָה אִם זָכָה, כְּאִשְׁתּוֹ שֶׁל רַבִּי חֲנִינָא בַּר חֲכִינָאי, וְאִם לָאו, כְּאִשְׁתּוֹ שֶׁל רַבִּי יוֹסֵי הַגְּלִילִי. רַבִּי יוֹסֵי הֲוָה לֵיהּ אִנְתְּתָא בִּישָׁא, וַהֲוַת בְּרַתָּא דַּאֲחָתֵיהּ, וַהֲוַת בָּזֵית לֵיהּ קֳדָם תַּלְמִידוֹי, אָמְרִין תַּלְמִידָיו שַׁבְקָא לַהֲדָא אִנְתְּתָא בִּישָׁא דְּלֵיתָא מְיַקְרָךְ. אֲמַר לְהוֹן פּוּרְנָא רַב עָלַי, לֵית בְּיָדִי מָה אֶשְׁבּוֹק לָהּ. חַד זְמַן הֲווֹן יָתְבִין פָּשְׁטִין הוּא וְרַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר בֶּן עֲזַרְיָה, דְּמִן חַסְלִין אֲמַר לֵיהּ מַשְׁגַּח רַבִּי וַאֲנַן סָלְקִין בְּבֵיתָא, אֲמַר לֵיהּ אִין, סָלֵיק, כִּי סְלֵיק אַמַּכַת לְאַפָּהּ וּנְפַקַת לָהּ, צָפָה בְּהַהִיא קְדֵרָה, אֲמַר לָהּ אִית בְּהַהִיא קְדֵרָה כְּלוּם, אֲמַרָה לֵיהּ אִית פַּרְפְּרָיִין, אָזַל גַּלֵּיתָהּ וְאַשְׁכַּח פַּרְגָיִין, יָדַע רַבִּי אֶלְעָזָר בֶּן עֲזַרְיָה מַה הוּא שָׁמַע, יָתְבוּן לְהוֹן אָכְלִין, אֲמַר לֵיהּ רַבִּי לָא אֲמַרַת אֶלָּא פַּרְפְּרָיִין וְהָא אַשְׁכַּחְנַן בְּגַוָּהּ פַּרְגָיִין, אֲמַר לֵיהּ מַעֲשֶׂה נִסִּים הֵן. מִן דְּחַסְלִין אֲמַר לֵיהּ רַבִּי שְׁבוֹקָא הַהִיא אִנְתְּתָא מִינָךְ, דְּלֵית הִיא עָבְדָא לִיקְרָתָךְ. אֲמַר לֵיהּ פּוּרְנָא רַב עָלַי וְלֵית בִּי מָה אֶשְׁבּוֹק לָהּ. אֲמַר לֵיהּ אֲנַן יַהֲבִינַן לָהּ פּוּרְנָא וְשַׁבְקֵית מִינָךְ. עֲבַדּוּן לֵיהּ כֵּן פְּסַק לָהּ פּוּרְנָא וּשְׁבַק יָתָהּ מִינֵיהּ וְאַסְבוּן יָתֵיהּ אִתְּתָא אָחֳרָא טָבָא מִינַהּ, גַּרְמוּן חוֹבִין דְּהַהִיא אִתְּתָא וַאֲזַלַּת וְאִתְנַסְבֵית לְסַנְטְרִין דְּקַרְתָּא, לְבָתַר יוֹמִין אֲתוֹן יִסּוּרִין עָלָיו וְאִתְעַוֵּר, וַהֲוַת צָיְירַת בִּיְדֵיהּ וּמְחַזְרָא לֵיהּ עַל שְׁקָקַיָא דְּקַרְתָּא, כֵּיוָן דַּהֲוַת מַטְיָא בִּשְׁקָקַיָא דְּרַבִּי יוֹסֵי הַגְּלִילִי הֲוַת קָיְימָא לָהּ וְחָזְרָה לַאֲחוֹרָהּ, מִן דַּהֲוָה הַהוּא גַבְרָא חַכִּים קַרְתָּא אֲמַר לָהּ לָמָּה אַתְּ לֹא מוֹבַלְתְּ לִי לִשְׁכוּנְתֵיהּ דְּרַבִּי יוֹסֵי הַגְּלִילִי, דַּאֲנָא שָׁמַע דְּהַהוּא עָבִיד מִצְוָה. אֲמַרַת לֵיהּ מַשְׁבַּקְתֵּיהּ אֲנָא, וְלֵית בִּי דְּלֶחֱמֵי סְבַר אַפּוֹהִי. חַד זְמַן אֲתוֹן קָרוֹן בִּשְׁכוּנְתֵיהּ דְּרַבִּי יוֹסֵי, אַרְגֵּישׁ בַּהּ יוֹם קֳדָמוֹי, וְיוֹם תִּנְיָן וּשְׁרֵי מָחֵי לָהּ, וַאֲזֵיל קָלְהוֹן וַהֲווֹן מִתְבַּזִּין בְּכָל קַרְתָּא, אוֹדִיק רַבִּי יוֹסֵי לְקָלְהוֹן וַחֲמְהוֹן מִתְבַּזִּין בְּגוֹ שׁוּקָא, אֲמַר לֵיהּ אַתְּ מָחֵי לָהּ, אֲמַר לֵיהּ כָּל יוֹם הִיא מוֹבְדָה פַּרְנָסָתֵיהּ דְּהָדֵין שְׁקָקַיָּה מִנִּי, כֵּיוָן דִּשְׁמַע רַבִּי יוֹסֵי כֵּן נְסַבֵיהוֹן וִיהֵיב יָתְהוֹן בְּחָדָא בֵּיתָא מִן דִּידֵיהּ, וַהֲוָה מְפַרְנֵס יָתְהוֹן כָּל יוֹמֵי חַיֵּיהוֹן, עַל שֵׁם (ישעיה נח, ז): וּמִבְּשָׂרְךָ לֹא תִתְעַלָּם.

(2) “It is not good” – Rabbi Yaakov taught: Anyone who does not have a wife is without good, without help, without joy, without blessing, without atonement. Without good – “it is not good that the man should be alone.” Without help – “I will make a helper for him alongside him.” Without joy – as it is stated: “You shall rejoice, you and your household” (Deuteronomy 14:26). Without atonement – “he shall atone for himself and for his household” (Leviticus 16:11). Without blessing – “to lay a blessing upon your house” (Ezekiel 44:30).
Rabbi Simon said in the name of Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi: He is also without peace, as it is stated: “You shall be in peace, and your household shall be in peace” (I Samuel 25:6). Rabbi Yehoshua of Sikhnin said in the name of Rabbi Levi: He is also without life, as it is stated: “Appreciate life with a woman whom you love” (Ecclesiastes 9:9). Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Gamda said: He is not even a complete man, as it is stated: “He blessed them, and He called their name Man, on the day they were created” (Genesis 5:2) – when both of them are together they are called “Man.” Some say he even diminishes the [divine] image, as it is stated: “As He made man in the image of God” (Genesis 9:6). What is written thereafter? “And you, be fruitful, and multiply” (Genesis 9:7).

(3) “I will make a helper for him alongside him [kenegdo]” – if one merits, she [his wife] is a helper, but if not, she is against him [kenegdo]. Rabbi Yehoshua bar Neḥemya said: If he merits, [his wife will be] like the wife of Rabbi Ḥanina bar Ḥakhinai, but if not, she will be like the wife of Rabbi Yosei the HaGelili. The wife of Rabbi Yosei [HaGelili] was malicious, though she was his sister’s daughter. She would humiliate him in the presence of his students. His students said: Be rid of that malicious wife who does not respect you. He said to them: Her marriage contract is too large for me, and I do not have enough [money] to be rid of her. One time he and Rabbi Elazar ben Azarya were sitting and studying. When they finished, he [Rabbi Yosei] said to him: ‘Rabbi, accept my suggestion, and let us go up to my house [to eat].’ He said to him: ‘Yes, let us go up.’ When he went up, she looked downward and walked out. He saw a pot and said to her: ‘Is there anything in that pot?’ She said to him: ‘There is only relish.’ He went and opened it and found pieces of chicken. Rabbi Elazar ben Azarya realized what he had heard. They sat and ate. He said to him: ‘Rabbi, did she not say there was only relish? Yet we found pieces of chicken in it.’ He said to him: ‘They [came about] through a miraculous act.’ When they finished, he said to him: ‘Rabbi, be rid of that wife, because she does not act respectfully towards you.’ He said to him: ‘Her marriage contract is too large for me, and I do not have enough [money] to be rid of her.’ He said: ‘We will pay her the marriage contract, and you can be rid of her.’ They did this for him, and he was able to pay her marriage contract and be rid of her. He married a different wife, who was better than her.
The sins of that women brought about that she went and married the city watchman. Some time later, he experienced suffering and became blind. She would hold his hand and take him around the city streets. When she reached the street of Rabbi Yosei HaGelili, she stopped and turned back. Because that man knew well the [layout of the] city, he said to her: ‘Why did you not take me to the neighborhood of Rabbi Yosei HaGelili, of whom I heard that he gives charity?’ She said to him: ‘I am his divorcée, and I cannot bear to see his face.’
One time, they came and called in Rabbi Yosei’s neighborhood. He realized what she was doing on the first day and the second day, and then he began to hit her. Their voices were loud and audible, and they became disgraced throughout the city. Rabbi Yosei looked in the direction of their voices, and he saw them becoming disgraced in the streets. He said to him: ‘Why are you hitting her?’ He said to him: ‘Every day she causes me to lose the support [that I could take in] from this street.’ When Rabbi Yosei heard this, he took them and put them up in a house that he owned and supported them all the days of their lives, due to [the verse]: “Do not disregard your own flesh” (Isaiah 58:7).

(א) רְאֵה חַיִּים עִם אִשָּׁה אֲשֶׁר אָהַבְתָּ, אָמַר רַבִּי מִשּׁוּם עֵדָה קְדוֹשָׁה, קְנֵה לְךָ אֻמָּנוּת עִם הַתּוֹרָה, מַה טַּעְמָא רְאֵה חַיִּים וגו', וְלָמָּה הוּא קוֹרֵא אוֹתָן עֵדָה קְדוֹשָׁה, שֶׁשָּׁם הָיוּ רַבִּי יוֹסֵי בֶּן מְשֻׁלָּם וְרַבִּי שִׁמְעוֹן בֶּן מְנַסְיָא, שֶׁהָיוּ מְשַׁלְּשִׁין הַיּוֹם, שְׁלִישׁ לְתוֹרָה, שְׁלִישׁ לִתְפִלָּה, שְׁלִישׁ לִמְלָאכָה. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים שֶׁהָיוּ יְגֵעִין בַּתּוֹרָה בִּימוֹת הַחֹרֶף, וּבִמְלָאכָה בִּימוֹת הַקַּיִץ. רַבִּי יִצְחָק בֶּן אֶלְעָזָר הָיָה קוֹרֵא לְרַבִּי יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בְּרֵיהּ דְּרַבִּי טִימֵי וְרַבִּי בּוּרְקֵי עֵדָה קְדוֹשָׁה, שֶׁהָיוּ מְשַׁלְּשִׁין שְׁלִישׁ לְתוֹרָה, שְׁלִישׁ לִתְפִלָּה, שְׁלִישׁ לִמְלָאָכָה. תָּנֵי אָבֵל אָסוּר לְהַכְנִיס לוֹ אִשָּׁה עַד שְׁלשִׁים יוֹם, רַבִּי יְהוּדָה אוֹמֵר עַד שֶׁעָבְרוּ שְׁלשָׁה רְגָלִים זֶה אַחַר זֶה, כְּנֶגֶד שָׁלשׁ פְּעָמִים שֶׁכָּתוּב חַיִּים, חַיִּים, חַיִּים, בַּמֶּה דְבָרִים אֲמוּרִים כְּשֶׁיֵּשׁ לוֹ בָּנִים, אֲבָל אֵין לוֹ בָּנִים אוֹ שֶׁהָיוּ לוֹ בָּנִים קְטַנִּים, מֻתָּר, מִפְּנֵי מִעוּט פְּרִיָּה וּרְבִיָּה וּפַרְנָסָתָן, וּמַעֲשֶׂה שֶׁמֵּתָה אִשְׁתּוֹ שֶׁל רַבִּי טַרְפוֹן וּכְשֶׁנִּסְתַּם הַגּוֹלֵל אָמַר לַאֲחוֹתָהּ בְּתוֹךְ הָאֵבֶל הִכָּנְסִי וְגַדְּלִי אֶת בְּנֵי אֲחוֹתֵךְ, וְאַף עַל פִּי שֶׁכְּנָסָהּ לֹא נָהַג בָּהּ דֶּרֶךְ אֶרֶץ אֶלָּא לְאַחַר שְׁלשִׁים יוֹם. תָּנֵי אָבֵל אָסוּר לֵילֵךְ לְבֵית הַמִּשְׁתֶּה עַד שְׁלשִׁים יוֹם. תָּנֵי, מִצְווֹת הָאָב חַיָּב בִּבְנוֹ לְמוּלוֹ וְלִפְדּוֹתוֹ, וְגַם לְלַמְּדוֹ תּוֹרָה, וּלְלַמְּדוֹ אֻמָּנוּת, וּלְהַשִֹּׂיאוֹ אִשָּׁה, וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים אַף לְהוֹשִׁיטוֹ בַּנָּהָר. לְמוּלוֹ מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית יז, יב): וּבֶן שְׁמֹנַת יָמִים יִמּוֹל לָכֶם כָּל זָכָר. לִפְדּוֹתוֹ מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמות יג, יג): וְכֹל בְּכוֹר אָדָם בְּבָנֶיךָ תִּפְדֶּה. לְלַמְּדוֹ תּוֹרָה מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים יא, יט): וּלְמַדְתֶּם אֹתָם. לְלַמְּדוֹ אֻמָּנוּת מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים ל, יט): וּבָחַרְתָּ בַּחַיִּים. לִשָֹּׂא אִשָּׁה מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ירמיה כט, ה): קְחוּ נָשִׁים וְהוֹלִידוּ בָּנִים וּבָנוֹת וּקְחוּ לִבְנֵיכֶם נָשִׁים. לְהוֹשִׁיטוֹ בַּנָּהָר מִנַּיִן, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: וּבָחַרְתָּ בַּחַיִּים. וְכָל מִי שֶׁאֵין לוֹ אִשָּׁה שָׁרוּי בְּלֹא טוֹב, בְּלֹא עֵזֶר, בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה, בְּלֹא בְּרָכָה, בְּלֹא כַּפָּרָה. בְּלֹא טוֹב מִנַּיִן (בראשית ב, יח): לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ. בְּלֹא עֵזֶר מִנַּיִן (בראשית ב, יח): אֶעֱשֶׂה לוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, בְּלֹא שִׂמְחָה מִנַּיִן (דברים יד, כו): וְשָׂמַחְתָּ אַתָּה וּבֵיתֶךָ. בְּלֹא בְּרָכָה מִנַּיִן (יחזקאל מד, ל): לְהָנִיחַ בְּרָכָה אֶל בֵּיתֶךָ. בְּלֹא כַפָּרָה מִנַּיִן (ויקרא טז, יא): וְכִפֶּר בַּעֲדוֹ וּבְעַד בֵּיתוֹ. רַבִּי יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן לֵוִי אוֹמֵר אַף בְּלֹא חַיִּים, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר: רְאֵה חַיִּים עִם אִשָּׁה אֲשֶׁר אָהַבְתָּ. בְּלֹא שָׁלוֹם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמואל א כה, ו): וְאַתָּה שָׁלוֹם וּבֵיתְךָ שָׁלוֹם. רַבִּי חִיָּא בַּר גַּמְדָא אָמַר אַף אֵינוֹ אָדָם שָׁלֵם, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית ה, ב): וַיְבָרֶךְ אֹתָם וַיִּקְרָא אֶת שְׁמָם אָדָם, בִּזְּמַן שֶׁשְּׁנֵיהֶם כְּאֶחָד הֵם אָדָם, אֵין שְׁנֵיהֶם כְּאֶחָד אֵין קְרוּיִין אָדָם. וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים אַף מְמַעֵט בַּדְּמוּת, שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית ט, ו): כִּי בְּצֶלֶם אֱלֹהִים עָשָׂה אֶת הָאָדָם.

(1)“Enjoy life with a woman whom you love all the days of your life of vanity which He has given you under the sun, all the days of your vanity, as that is your portion in life, and in your toil that you toil under the sun” (Ecclesiastes 9:9).
“Enjoy life with a woman whom you love.” Rabbi [Yehuda HaNasi] said in the name of the holy congregation: Acquire for yourself a craft with Torah. What is the reason? “Enjoy life [with a woman]…” Why does he call them the holy congregation? It is because Rabbi Yosei ben Meshulam and Rabbi Shimon ben Menaseya, who would divide the day into three, one-third for Torah, one-third for prayer, and one-third for labor, were there. Some say: They would engage in Torah study during the days of winter, and in labor during the days of summer. Rabbi Yitzḥak ben Elazar would call Rabbi Yehoshua son of Rabbi Timi and Rabbi Burki the holy congregation, because they would divide the day into three, one-third for Torah, one-third for prayer, and one-third for labor.
It is taught: It is prohibited for a mourner to marry a woman until thirty days [pass]. Rabbi Yehuda says: Until three consecutive pilgrimage festivals pass, corresponding to the three times that it is written: Life, life, life. In what case is this said? In a case when he has sons; however, if he has no sons, or if he has minor sons, it is permitted due to diminution of procreation and to see to their needs. There was an incident and the wife of Rabbi Tarfon died, and when the grave was covered, he said to her sister amidst the mourning: ‘Enter my house and raise your sister’s children.’ Even though he married her, he did not engage in conjugal relations until after thirty days. It is taught: It is prohibited for a mourner to go to a house of feasting until thirty days [have passed].
It was taught: The mitzvot incumbent upon a father regarding his son are to circumcise him and to redeem him, and also to teach him Torah, to teach him a trade, and to marry him to a woman. Some say: Also to teach him to swim in a river. To circumcise him, from where [is it derived]? As it is stated: “He that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every male” (Genesis 17:12). To redeem him, from where [is it derived]? As it is stated: “And all the first-born of man among your sons you shall redeem” (Exodus 13:13). To teach him Torah, from where [is it derived]? As it is stated: “You shall teach them” (Deuteronomy 11:19). To marry a woman, from where [is it derived]? As it is stated: “Take women and beget sons and daughters and take women for your sons” (Jeremiah 29:6). To teach him to swim in a river, from where [is it derived]? As it is stated: “You shall choose life” (Deuteronomy 30:19).
Anyone who does not have a wife is without goodness, without a helper, without joy, without blessing, without atonement. Without good, from where [is it derived]? [From the verse:] “It is not good for man to be alone” (Genesis 2:18). Without help, from where [is it derived]? [From the verse:] “I will make him a helper alongside him” (Genesis 2:18). Without joy, from where [is it derived]? [From the verse:] “You shall rejoice, you and your household” (Deuteronomy 14:26). Without blessing, from where [is it derived]? [From the verse:] “To place a blessing upon your house” (Ezekiel 44:30). Without atonement, from where [is it derived]? [From the verse:] “And he shall atone for himself and for his household” (Leviticus 16:11). Rabbi Yehoshua ben Levi says: Without life as well, as it is stated: “Enjoy life with a woman whom you love.” Without peace, as it is stated: “You are peace and your house is peace” (I Samuel 25:6). Rabbi Ḥiyya bar Gamda said: He is not even a complete person, as it is stated: “He blessed them and He called their name Adam” (Genesis 5:2) – when the two of them are not as one they are not called Adam. Some say it diminishes the Divine Image, as it is stated: “Because He created man in the image of God” (Genesis 9:6).

(א)לא טוב היות וגו'. שֶׁלֹּא יֹאמְרוּ שְׁתֵּי רָשׁוּיוֹת הֵן, הַקָּבָּ"ה יָחִיד בָעֶלְיוֹנִים וְאֵין לוֹ זוּג, וְזֶה יָחִיד בַתַּחְתּוֹנִים וְאֵין לוֹ זוּג (בראשית רבה): (ב)עזר כנגדו. זָכָה – עֵזֶר; לֹא זָכָה – כְּנֶגְדּוֹ לְהִלָּחֵם:

(1) 'לא טוב היות וגו IT IS NOT GOOD etc. — I shall make an help meet for him in order that people may not say that there are two Deities, the Holy One, blessed be He, the only One among the celestial Beings without a mate, and this one (Adam), the only one among the terrestrial beings, without a mate (Pirkei D'Rabbi Eliezer 12). (2) עזר כנגדו A HELP MEET FOR HIM — (כנגדו literally, opposite, opposed to him) If he is worthy she shall be a help to him; if he is unworthy she shall be opposed to him, to fight him (Yevamot 63a).

(א)ויאמר טעם לא טוב, לאדם, (ב) ועזר, כטעם "טובים השנים מן האחד" (קהלת ד ט),,

(1) AND THE LORD GOD SAID. It is not good means it is not good for the man. (2) A HELP MEET. Help meet should be understood in the light of Two are better than one (Eccles. 4:9).

(א)לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ אֵינֶנּוּ נִרְאֶה שֶׁנִּבְרָא הָאָדָם לִהְיוֹת יָחִיד בָּעוֹלָם וְלֹא יוֹלִיד, שֶׁכָּל הַנִּבְרָאִים זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה מִכָּל בָּשָׂר נִבְרְאוּ לְהָקִים זֶרַע, וְגַם הָעֵשֶׂב וְהָעֵץ זַרְעָם בָּהֶם. אֲבָל יִתָּכֵן לוֹמַר כִּי הָיָה כְּדִבְרֵי הָאוֹמֵר (ברכות סא) דּוּ פַּרְצוּפִים נִבְרְאוּ, וְנַעֲשׂוּ שֶׁיִּהְיוּ בָּהֶם טֶבַע מֵבִיא בְּאֵבְרֵי הַהוֹלָדָה מִן הַזָּכָר לַנְּקֵבָה כֹּחַ מוֹלִיד, אוֹ תֹּאמַר זֶרַע כְּפִי הַמַּחְלֹקֶת הַיָּדוּעַ בָּעִבּוּר, וְהָיָה הַפַּרְצוּף הַשֵּׁנִי עֵזֶר לָרִאשׁוֹן בְּתוֹלַדְתּוֹ, וְרָאָה הקב"ה כִּי טוֹב שֶׁיִּהְיֶה הָעֵזֶר עוֹמֵד לְנֶגְדּוֹ, וְהוּא יִרְאֶנּוּ וְיִפָּרֵד מִמֶּנּוּ וְיִתְחַבֵּר אֵלָיו כְּפִי רְצוֹנוֹ, וְזֶהוּ שֶׁאָמַר "אֶעֱשֶׂה לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ". וְטַעַם "לֹא טוֹב", שֶׁלֹּא יֵאָמֵר בּוֹ כִּי טוֹב בִּהְיוֹתוֹ לְבַדּוֹ, שֶׁלֹּא יִתְקַיֵּם כֵּן. בְּמַעֲשֵׂה בְּרֵאשִׁית הַ"טוֹב" הוּא הַקִּיּוּם כַּאֲשֶׁר פֵּרַשְׁתִּי בְּמַאֲמַר "וַיַּרְא אֱלֹהִים כִּי טוֹב" (רמב"ן על בראשית א':ד'):

(1) IT IS NOT GOOD THAT THE MAN SHOULD BE ALONE. It does not appear likely that man was created to be alone in the world and not beget children since all created beings — male and female of all flesh — were created to raise seed. The herb and trees also have their seed in them. But it is possible to say that it was in accordance with the opinion of the Rabbi who says: “Adam was created with two faces [i.e., male and female persons combined],” and they were so made that there should be in them an impulse causing the organs of generation to produce a generative force from male to female, or you may say “seed,” in accordance with the known controversy concerning pregnancy, and the second face was a help to the first in the procreative process. And the Holy One, blessed be He, saw that it is good that “the help” stand facing him, and that he should see and be separated from it or joined to it at his will. This is the meaning of what He said in the verse, I will make him a helper opposite him.
The meaning of the expression, it is not good, is that it cannot be said of man that “it is good” when he is alone for he will not be able to so exist. In the work of creation, “the good” means existence, as I have explained on the text, And G-d saw that it was good.

(א)לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ. לֹא יֻשַּׂג טוֹב הַתַּכְלִית הַמְכֻוָּן בִּדְמוּתוֹ וּבְצַלְמוֹ, אִם יִצְטָרֵךְ לְהִתְעַסֵּק הוּא עַצְמוֹ בְּצָרְכֵי חַיָּיו: (ב)עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. עֵזֶר שֶׁיִּהְיֶה כְּמוֹ שָׁוֶה לוֹ בְּצֶלֶם וּדְמוּת, כִּי זֶה הֶכְרֵחִי לוֹ בִּידִיעַת צְרָכָיו וְהַמְצִיאָם בְּמוֹעֲדָם. וְאָמַר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, כִּי הַנִּכְנָס לְכַף נֶגֶד דָּבָר אַחֵר כְּשֶׁיִּהְיֶה שָׁוֶה לוֹ בְּשֶׁקֶל, יִהְיֶה נֶגְדּוֹ בְּקַו יָשָׁר, אֲבָל כְּשֶׁלֹּא יִהְיוּ שָׁוִים שְׁנֵי הַנִּשְׁקָלִים, יִהְיֶה זֶה עוֹלֶה וְזֶה יוֹרֵד וְלֹא יִהְיוּ זֶה נֶגֶד זֶה בְּקַו יָשָׁר. וּבָזֶה הָאוֹפֶן אָמְרוּ רַבּוֹתֵינוּ זִכְרוֹנָם לִבְרָכָה שָׁקוּל מֹשֶׁה כְּנֶגֶד כָּל יִשְׂרָאֵל (מכילתא יתרו א), אָמְנָם לֹא הָיָה רָאוּי שֶׁיִּהְיֶה הָעֵזֶר שָׁוֶה לוֹ לְגַמְרֵי, כִּי אָז לֹא הָיָה רָאוּי שֶׁיַּעֲבֹד וִישָׁרֵת אֶחָד מֵהֶם לַחֲבֵרוֹ.

(1) לא טוב היות האדם לבדו, the purpose of the human species on earth will not be achieved while man who is supposed to reflect the divine image will be left to personally carry out all the menial tasks of daily life on earth by being solitary. (2) עזר כנגדו, a helpmate who will be equal to him, also reflecting the divine image. This is essential for him if he is to know what precisely his needs are and so that he can meet them in time. The reason why the Torah added the word כנגדו is that whenever one confronts someone of equal power, moral and ethical weight, such a confrontation is termed נגד. It is a head-on collision of will. When the two parties disagreeing are not of equal power, or moral/ethical weight, the confrontation is termed as one being עולה or יורד one of the adversaries either prevailing or losing in such an encounter. It is in this sense that we have to understand such statements as משה שקול כנגד כל ישראל, “that Moses was the equal of the entire Jewish people.” (Mechilta Yitro 1) However, the Torah did not mean for woman to be 100% equal to man, else how could the man expect her to perform household chores for him, etc.? Hence the letter כ at the beginning of the word כנגדו somewhat tones down this equality.

(א)לא טוב היות האדם לבדו מתחילה עלה במחשבה לעשות לו זוג ולא מצא פתח לעשות עד לאחר קריאת השמות כדי שיתאוה לה ויחבבנה יותר.

(1) לא טוב היות האדם לבדו, “it is not good for Adam to remain solitary;” this was not a new idea that G-d had; He had planned for it all the time; He did not want to impose a partner on Adam, and that is why He gave him a chance to name the animals and to find that all of them had suitable mates, something that he now felt he lacked. G-d therefore responded to a wish of Adam that he had not even voiced as yet. If the mate was provided in response to his longing he would appreciate his wife more.

(א)וַיֹּאמֶר ה׳ וְגוֹ׳ לֹא טוֹב וְגוֹ׳. קָשֶׁה, הֲלֹא כְּבָר בְּיוֹם בְּרֹא אֱלֹהִים אָדָם ״זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה בָּרָא אוֹתָם״ (בראשית א:כז). עוֹד קָשֶׁה אָמְרוֹ סָמוּךְ לוֹ אֶעֱשֶׂה לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ וְגוֹמֵר וַיִּצֶר וְגוֹמֵר כָּל חַיַּת הַשָּׂדֶה, שֶׁנִּרְאֶה שֶׁרָצָה לְזַוֵּג לוֹ חַיַּת הַשָּׂדֶה, וְזֶה פֶּלֶא לְזַוֵּג אָדָם וּבְהֵמָה. וְעוֹד שֶׁיָּסִיר נְקֵבַת בְּהֵמָה אוֹ חַיָּה מִבֶּן זוּגָהּ וּלְזַוְּגָהּ עִם הָאָדָם, עֶלְיוֹנִים לְמַטָּה וְתַחְתּוֹנִים לְמַעְלָה. עוֹד קָשֶׁה אָמְרוֹ וַיַּפֵּל ה׳ תַּרְדֵּמָה וְגוֹ׳, וְכִי לֹא הָיָה ה׳ יָכוֹל לִבְרֹא לוֹ בַּת זוּגוֹ עָפָר מִן הָאֲדָמָה? מִלְּבַד מַה שֶׁהִקְשֵׁינוּ שֶׁמָּצִינוּ לוֹ שֶׁבָּרָא לוֹ בַּת זוּגוֹ בְּיוֹם הִבָּרְאוֹ, וּכְמוֹ שֶׁהֵעִיד הַכָּתוּב אַחַר כֵּן ״זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה בְּרָאָם וְגוֹ׳ בְּיוֹם הִבָּרְאָם״ (בראשית ה:ב), וְרַזַ״ל אָמְרוּ דְּרָשׁוֹת רַבּוֹת וּצְרִיכִין פּוֹתֵר, אֲבָל פְּשַׁט הַכָּתוּב לֹא מְצָאנוּהוּ. (ב)וְנִרְאֶה לְפִי מַה שֶׁקָּדַם מִדִּבְרֵי רַזַ״ל (ברכות סא.) כִּי אָדָם וְחַוָּה דּוּ פַּרְצוּפִין נִבְרְאוּ, לְמַאן דְּאָמַר פַּרְצוּף, וּלְמַאן דְּאָמַר זָנָב, כִּדְאִיתָא בְּמַסֶּכֶת שַׁבָּת, וּכְפִי זֶה זֹאת הָאִשָּׁה וְזֶה בִּנְיָנָהּ, כִּי מִתְּחִלָּה בְּרָאָהּ דְּבוּקָה עִמּוֹ מַמָּשׁ, לְמַאן דְּאָמַר כִּסְבָרָתוֹ וּלְמַאן דְּאָמַר כִּסְבָרָתוֹ. וּבְסֵדֶר זֶה יֶשְׁנָם גַּם כֵּן בַּהֲכָנַת הַמּוֹלִיד, דַּהֲלֹא תִּמְצָא שֶׁאָמַר ה׳ לָהֶם (בראשית א:כח) ״פְּרוּ וּרְבוּ״ וְגוֹ׳ קוֹדֶם הַנְּסִירָה, הָא לָמַדְתָּ שֶׁהֱכִינָם ה׳ לְהוֹלִיד גַּם בִּהְיוֹתָם בְּסֵדֶר זֶה, וְזֹאת הָאִשָּׁה אֲשֶׁר נִסֵּר ה׳ וּלְקָחָהּ מִמְּקוֹם דְּבִיקָתָהּ אֲשֶׁר בְּרָאָהּ בְּיוֹם הִבָּרְאָם. (ג) גַּם דָּבָר יָדוּעַ הוּא כִּי כָל מַשְׂכִּיל וְחָכָם הַמַּתְחִיל לְהַבִּיט אִמְרֵי נֹעַם ה׳, תּוֹרַת ה׳, מֵעֵת יֵאוֹרוּ עֵינָיו יֵדַע גֹּדֶל הַפְלָגַת מִדַּת טוּבוֹ יִתְבָּרַךְ אֲשֶׁר הִגְדִּיל לְהִתְחַכֵּם לְהָכִין הַפְלָגַת הַטּוֹב וְהַכָנָתוֹ. וּמֵעַתָּה יֵשׁ לָנוּ לַחְקֹר זֹאת סִבַּת חֵטְא הָאָדָם וּמַה שֶׁנִּתְגַּלְגֵּל לוֹ וְלִכְלָלוּת הַנִּבְרָאִים, וּמְצָאנוּהָ כִּי הִיא הָאִשָּׁה הָיְתָה סִבָּה לְכָל הֶפְסֵד וְכִלְיוֹן הָעוֹלָם, שֶׁשָּׁלַט בָּהּ הַנָּחָשׁ וְנִצַּח דַּעְתָּהּ וְלֹא הָיָה עִמָּהּ הָאָדָם, כַּנִּשְׁמָע מֵהַכָּתוּב. וְאָמְרוּ זִכְרוֹנָם לִבְרָכָה (בראשית רבה יט,ג) כִּי הָיָה הָאָדָם יָשֵׁן אוֹ לְמַאן דְּאָמַר שֶׁהָיָה עוֹבֵר בָּעוֹלָם וְכוּ׳ וּמָצָא נָחָשׁ לְחַוָּה בִּפְנֵי עַצְמָהּ וְהֵסִיתָהּ. וּמֵעַתָּה יִהְיֶה פֶּה וְלָשׁוֹן לַנִּבְרָאִים לוֹמַר יַד ה׳ עָשְׂתָה זֹאת בְּמַה שֶׁנִּסְּרָהּ וְלֹא הִנִּיחַ תַּכְלִית הַבְּרִיאָה כַּסֵּדֶר הָרִאשׁוֹן וְלֹא הָיָה מָקוֹם לַנָּחָשׁ לְהָסִית הָאִשָּׁה בִּפְנֵי עַצְמָהּ. אֲשֶׁר עַל כֵּן נִתְחַכֵּם ה׳ וְכָתַב קֹדֶם לְקִיחַת הַצֵּלָע מֵהָאָדָם טַעַם הַדָּבָר שֶׁכַּוָּנַת ה׳ בַּדָּבָר הָיְתָה לְהֵיטִיב לְהָאָדָם, אֱלֹהִים חֲשָׁבָהּ לְטוֹבָה כְּמִדַּת אֱלֹהֵינוּ. וְזֶה הוּא שִׁעוּר וּמַשְׁמָעוּת הַכְּתוּבִים: אַחַר אֲשֶׁר הוֹדִיעַ אוֹתָנוּ בִּבְרִיאַת יוֹם ו׳ כִּי בָּרָא הָאָדָם זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה דּוּ פַּרְצוּפִין אוֹ זָנָב, רָאָה ה׳ כִּי לֹא נָכוֹן שֶׁיִּהְיֶה הָאָדָם בַּד אֶחָד. וַהֲגַם שֶׁהָיְתָה לוֹ בַּת זוּג, אַף עַל פִּי כֵן אֶחָד הָיָה וְאֵינוֹ אֶלָּא לְבַדּוֹ. וְהַמָּשָׁל בָּזֶה – אִם יִרְצֶה הוּא לָלֶכֶת לַעֲשׂוֹת חֲפָצָיו תֵּלֵךְ עִמּוֹ, גַּם אִם תֵּלֵךְ הָאִשָּׁה לְשַׁמֵּשׁ בַּעְלָהּ יֵלֵךְ עִמָּהּ גַּם כֵּן, וְנִמְצָא שֶׁהוּא בַּד אֶחָד. וְנִמְלַךְ ה׳ כִּי הָעֵזֶר תִּהְיֶה עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ, פֵּרוּשׁ בִּנְיָן נִפְרָד לְמוּלוֹ לְשַׁמְּשׁוֹ וְלַהֲכָנָתוֹ, כִּי לִבְחִינַת הַהוֹלָדָה וְהַזִּוּוּג כְּבָר הֻטְבַּע בַּסֵּדֶר הָרִאשׁוֹן, כִּי מָצִינוּ לוֹ שֶׁצִּוָּה לָהֶם ״פְּרוּ וּרְבוּ״ קֹדֶם הַנְּסִירָה. וּמֵעַתָּה, אִם לָזֶה הָיְתָה סִבַּת קִיחַת הַנְּקֵבָה מִצַּד הָאָדָם, יֶשְׁנוֹ מְצִיאוּת אַחֵר שֶׁיִּגְזֹר ה׳ עַל אֶחָד מֵהַנִּבְרָאִים וְיִהְיֶה לוֹ לְעֵזֶר לְהוֹעִיל, וְתִשָּׁאֵר הָאִשָּׁה בִּמְקוֹם יְצִירָתָהּ. לָזֶה אָמַר הַכָּתוּב (בראשית ב:יט): וַיִּיצֶר וְגוֹ׳ כָּל חַיַּת הַשָּׂדֶה וְגוֹ׳ וַיָּבֵא אֶל הָאָדָם לִרְאוֹת מַה יִּקְרָא לוֹ, כִּי בִּבְחִינַת קְרִיאַת הַשֵּׁם תּוּכַּר בְּחִינַת הַמֶּזֶג, וּבְאֶמְצָעוּת הַהַכָּרָה יוּכַל לְבָרֵר מְצִיאוּת הָעֵזֶר הֲיֶשְׁנָהּ. וְהוֹדִיעַ הַכָּתוּב כִּי לֹא מָצָא עֵזֶר, וְהֻכְרַח לִקְלֹעַ הַנְּקֵבָה מִצִּדּוֹ וְלַעֲשׂוֹתָהּ כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. וְהַכַּוָּנָה הִיא לְטוֹבַת הָאָדָם, וְאִם אַחַר כָּךְ יָצָא מַה שֶׁיָּצָא וְהָיָה זֶה סִבָּה לְהַמְצָאַת הָאִשָּׁה בְּיִחוּד מִבַּלְעֲדֵי אִישָׁהּ וְהִכִּישָׁהּ נָחָשׁ, אֵין מָקוֹם לוֹמַר לָמָּה עָשָׂה ה׳ כָּכָה, כִּי אֱלֹקִים חֲשָׁבָהּ לְטוֹבָה וִישָׁרִים דַּרְכֵי ה׳ וְצַדִּיקִים יֵלְכוּ בָם וְגוֹ׳. וְזֶה הוּא שִׁעוּר הַכְּתוּבִים, לֶהֱיוֹת שֶׁרָצָה הַכָּתוּב לְהוֹדִיעַ חֵטְא הָאָדָם כִּי הוּא זֶה סִבָּה לִגְזֵרַת הַמָּוֶת וְהוּא הַסּוֹבֵב, וְהוּא מַה שֶׁאָמַר הַכָּתוּב (כה) ״וַיִּהְיוּ שְׁנֵיהֶם״ וְגוֹ׳ קֹדֶם לְהוֹדִיעַ הֲכָנַת הַסִּבָּה שֶׁהִיא לְצַד הֱיוֹת הָאִשָּׁה מֻפְרֶדֶת מִגּוּף אָדָם, וְהוּא אָמְרוֹ: וַיִּקַּח אַחַת מִצַּלְעֹתָיו, פֵּרוּשׁ נְסִירַת הָאִשָּׁה מֵהָאָדָם. וְלֶהֱיוֹת שֶׁתַּקְשֶׁה לוֹמַר וְלָמָּה הָיְתָה הֲכָנָה זוֹ לַחֵטְא, וְלֹא הָיָה לוֹ לַה׳ לִנְסֹר אוֹתָהּ וְקָנְתָה לָהּ מְקוֹמָהּ וְאָז לֹא הָיָה חֵטְא בָּעוֹלָם, לָזֶה קָדַם לוֹמַר כִּי הָיָה לְצַד הַהֶכְרֵחַ, וְהוּא אָמְרוֹ וַיֹּאמֶר וְגוֹ׳ לֹא טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ וְגוֹ׳, וַהֲגַם שֶׁבִּקֵּשׁ הָעֵזֶר מֵהַנִּבְרָאִים דִּכְתִיב ״וַיָּבֵא אֶל הָאָדָם״ וְגוֹ׳ לֹא מָצָא עֵזֶר לָאָדָם מֵהֶם וְהֻכְרַח לִנְסֹר הַנְּקֵבָה וְנָחָה דַּעַת אָדָם בָּהּ כְּנֶגְדּוֹ וְלֹא טְמוּנָה מֵאֲחוֹרָיו, כִּי בָּזֶה תִּשָּׂא עֹל סֻבֳּלוֹ לָנוּחַ הוּא בִּמְקוֹמוֹ וְאוֹתָהּ יִשְׁלַח לְהָכִין וְלַעֲשׂוֹת צְרָכָיו. (ד)וּלְפִי דַּרְכֵּנוּ יֵשׁ טַעַם נָכוֹן בַּחֲקִירָה אַחַת: לָמָּה ה׳ נִמְלַךְ מִמַּחְשַׁבְתּוֹ רִאשׁוֹנָה שֶׁבָּרָא הָאָדָם וּבַת זוּגוֹ עִמּוֹ וְחָזַר וּנְסָרָהּ? כִּי הַכַּוָּנָה הִיא לְהוֹדִיעַ כִּי מַעֲשֵׂה ה׳ טוֹב הוּא לַכֹּל, וֵאלֹהִים חֲשָׁבָהּ לְטוֹבָה וּבָרָא יַחַד זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה. אֶלָּא דִּלְצַד הֲנָאַת הָאָדָם לְסַדֵּר הֲכָנָתוֹ, הִפְרִידָם מִכָּל הַנִּבְרָאִים. אֵין נִשְׁתָּוִין אֵלָיו וְאֵין מְצִיאוּת לִבְרֹא לוֹ אָדָם אַחֵר לַהֲכָנָתוֹ, כִּי יֵשׁ טְעָמִים רַבִּים וְנִכְבָּדִים לְבִלְתִּי עֲשׂוֹת ה׳ ב׳ אָדָם כְּמַאֲמָרָם זִכְרוֹנָם לִבְרָכָה, וְהָבֵן. נִמְצֵאתָ אוֹמֵר כִּי כָל סֵדֶר הָאָמוּר בְּפָרָשָׁה זוֹ בְּבַקָּשַׁת הָעֵזֶר וּשְׁלִילָתוֹ וְהַמְצָאָתוֹ, אֵינוֹ אֶלָּא לְצַד עֲשׂוֹת הַנְּקֵבָה נִפְרֶדֶת מֵהַזָּכָר כִּי טוֹב הַב׳ מֵהָא׳. אֲבָל לְעִנְיַן הַזִּוּוּג הֲכָנַת פְּרִיָּה וּרְבִיָּה כְּבָר בְּרָאוֹ ה׳ בְּיוֹם ו׳ וּבְרָאָם לִפְרוֹת וְלִרְבּוֹת, וְאֵין מְנִיעָה לָזֶה לְצַד שֶׁאֵין פָּנִים בְּפָנִים, כִּי הֱכִינָם ה׳ לְהַרְכָּבָה גַּם בַּסֵּדֶר שֶׁהָיוּ בָּהּ אָחוֹר וְאָחוֹר, שֶׁיָּרִיק הַזָּכָר הַזֶּרַע דֶּרֶךְ מָקוֹם אֲשֶׁר בּוֹ הַנּוֹצָר. וְיֵשׁ לָנוּ לַחְקֹר זֹאת: לְאֵיזֶה טַעַם בָּרָא ה׳ הָאִשָּׁה בְּגוּף הָאָדָם מַמָּשׁ וְלֹא בְּרָאָהּ בְּרִיָּה בִּפְנֵי עַצְמָהּ מִן הֶעָפָר כְּמוֹ שֶׁבָּרָא הַזָּכָר? וְנִרְאֶה כִּי בָּזֶה גִּלָּה דַּעְתּוֹ יִתְבָּרַךְ כִּי יֵשׁ הֶפְרֵשׁ בֵּין הֲכָנַת זִוּוּג הָאֱנוֹשִׁי מִזִּוּוּג הַבַּהֲמִי, כִּי זִוּוּג הַבַּהֲמִי פּוֹעֵל פְּעֻלַּת הַהַזְרָעָה בְּכָל נְקֵבָה אֲשֶׁר תִּזְדַּמֵּן לְפָנָיו. וַהֲגַם שֶׁאָמַר הַכָּתוּב בְּסוּג זֶה גַּם כֵּן ״זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה״, לֹא שֶׁיִּתְחַיֵּב כָּל זָכָר לְהַכִּיר נְקֵבָתוֹ, כָּל שֶׁמִּמִּינוֹ הִיא כָּל אֲשֶׁר יִזְדַּמֵּן לְפָנָיו מִמִּינוֹ הֲרֵי הוּא רַשַּׁאי. וְאֵין רִשּׁוּם וְיִחוּד לִנְקֵבַת זָכָר בַּבַּהֲמִי לוֹמַר ״זוֹ פָּרָתוֹ שֶׁל שׁוֹר זֶה וְזוֹ פָּרָתוֹ״ וְכוּ׳, מַה שֶׁאֵין כֵּן הָאָדָם שֶׁלֹּא מִלְּבַד שֶׁמֻּבְדָּל בִּבְחִינַת הַמִּין, אֶלָּא גַּם מֻבְדָּל בִּפְרָטֵי הַמִּין, כִּי כָל אֶחָד יֵשׁ לוֹ בַּת זוּגוֹ בִּפְנֵי עַצְמוֹ. וְלָזֶה נִתְחַכֵּם ה׳ לִבְנוֹת בַּת זוּגוֹ שֶׁל הָאָדָם מֵעֲצָמָיו, לוֹמַר כִּי זוֹ בָּשָׂר מִבְּשָׂרוֹ. וְלָזֶה כְּשֶׁהִזְהִיר עַל הָעֲרָיוֹת רָשַׁם כִּנּוּי הָעֲרָיוֹת אֶל הַזְּכָרִים, כְּאָמְרוֹ (ויקרא יח:יד): ״עֶרְוַת אָבִיךָ, עֶרְוַת אֲחִי אָבִיךָ״ וְגוֹ׳, הֲרֵי שֶׁהֲגַם שֶׁאֵינוֹ מְצֻוֶּה אֶלָּא עַל הַנְּקֵבוֹת, מְיַחֵד הַדָּבָר אֶל הַזְּכָרִים, וְהָבֵן:

(1)ויאמר השם אלוקים לא טוב. The Lord G'd said: "It is not good for man to be alone, etc." This is difficult since G'd had mentioned already on the day He created man that the species had been created male and female (1,27). Another problem in the text is the expression אעשה, "I shall make for him a helpmate." The Torah then immediately proceeds to describe that the mammals and the birds were formed, i.e. ויצר השם אלוקים (2,19). This gives the impression that G'd intended one of these animals to be man's helpmate. Such a thought is not only extremely strange, but if true it would also result in one of those animals being deprived of its own mate! Besides, why did G'd have to put Adam to sleep and to remove part of his body? Could He not have formed woman as dust from the earth as He had formed man himself, especially since He formed Eve on the very same day He formed Adam (5,2) זכר ונקבה בראם? Our sages have given many homiletical explanations in answer to these questions, but they have not provided us with פשט, straightforward answers that justify the text as it stands. (2) We may have to fall back on the opinions expressed in Berachot 61 that originally man was created with two faces in one body. The Talmud there offers two opinions as to what was removed from Adam, a tail or a face, respectively. This is a reasonable explanation because it justifies G'd's blessing or command to Adam to be fruitful and to multiply (1,28) at a time when woman had not yet been reported as a separate entity. (3) It is in keeping with G'd's propensity for preparing everything good ahead of time, and providing many more opportunities for man to do good than evil. However, we must ask why He separated the two bodies enabling Eve to fall victim to the temptation by the serpent? This leads us to examine the cause of Adam's (Eve) sin, what happened to him and all of mankind as a result. We have found that woman became the cause of all that the world lost because the serpent prevailed over her in a match of wits. This occurred because Adam was not at her side at the time of Eve's encounter with the serpent. He was asleep as a result of having had marital relations with his wife (Bereshit Rabbah 19,3). Another version in the Midrash there suggests that G'd had taken him on a tour of the earth. As a result the serpent encountered Eve on her own and succeeded in seducing her. If the Torah had reported man's creation and the subsequent separation of Eve's body sequentially, without interposing Adam's experiences on earth in the interval, many people would have argued that what happened was all G'd's fault. They would have said that if G'd had not separated her body from that of her husband, thereby making a drastic change in what He had created originally, the serpent would never have had a chance to seduce Eve. In order to forestall such an argument the Torah tells us first the reason that G'd separated Eve's body from Adam's, i.e. in answer to Adam's own request. His observations of how the animals lived, male and female as separate bodies, had made him desirous of a similar arrangement. G'd had only the best of intentions, as usual. This is also the reason the Torah told us already at the outset that man was equipped to procreate from the moment he was created. Being one and the same body obviously had some of the same disadvantages as being a Siamese twin. G'd therefore decided it would be better for man's helpmate to be כנגדו, an appropriate complement, rather than the other half of his body. In this way she could be a help to him at all times instead of being a hindrance on occasion. Eve's being a separate body was not dictated by Adam's need to procreate. Seeing that the separation of her body served only to please Adam we must ask why none of the other creatures could have been trained to perform that task for Adam while leaving Eve in the state she had been created. The Torah therefore describes in verses 19 and 20 that Adam did indeed search for a suitable helpmate amongst all the other creatures but did not find one that was acceptable to him. Naming the animals, i.e. identifying their essence, was part of that search for a suitable helpmate. Eve's existence as a separate body from Adam had therefore become mandatory from Adam's point of view. It is totally incorrect to blame G'd for subsequent developments, such as Eve finding herself temporarily alone, facing an evil influence whose existence she had been quite unaware of. The Torah's report about both Adam's and Eve's innocence, i.e. their lack of shame at being nude, are all facts the Torah supplies to enable us to better understand the causes that led to the sin. Human relationships are based on people facing each other, i.e. כנגדו. The Torah describes Adam's profound joy when he finally beheld the partner who up until then had been hidden from him, i.e. had faced backwards. From G'd's point of view the original arrangement was perfectly acceptable, He had not created an imperfect human species. Any change was entirely in response to Adam's frame of mind, to accomodate him. Our sages have supplied us with numerous reasons why G'd did not create an entirely new human being to serve as Adam's helpmate. When Solomon told us in Kohelet (4,9)טובים השנים מן האחד, that two are better than one, that they can help each other, this has nothing to do with G'd having created man's form in such a way that he could have impregnated the wife which was part of him but facing backwards. (4) Perhaps the objective reason G'd had created the human species as a pair in a single body was to distinguish between the functions of the bodies of the animals and the functions of the human body. Animals mate indiscriminately, i.e. a male will mate with any female available to him, the act of mating being merely a response to biological urges. The fact that the Torah on occasion stresses the זכר ונקבה element when mentioning animals as pairs such as when they entered Noach's ark, does not mean that they have exclusive partners. The average animal does not recognise a female of its species as specifically "his" female. This is not the way G'd wanted man to relate to the subject of mating. It would have been impossible for Adam to describe his wife as בשר מבשרי, flesh of my own, were it not for the fact that Eve had been part of his own body previously. The whole idea that man's זווג is arranged in heaven would have been impossible to understand but for the fact that the female of the species is considered man's "other half." This consideration may also be the reason that when the Torah legislated forbidden sexual relations (Leviticus 18) the subject is always the male. It is forbidden to engage in sexual intercourse with certain women as they could not possibly be your missing "half."

(א)וַיֹּאמֶר ה׳ אֱלֹהִים. אָמַר אֶל לִבּוֹ, אוֹ אָמַר וְאָדָם שָׁמַע, וְהָאֲמִירָה קוֹל נִבְרָא לִשְׁעָתוֹ. וּלְפִי שֶׁשָּׁמַע מֵהָאֵל אֶעֱשֶׂה לּוֹ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ לְפִיכָךְ קִוָּה שֶׁיִּמְצִיאֵהוּ בְּהֵאָסֵף הַבְּרִיּוֹת לְפָנָיו, וְלָכֵן נִכְתַּב בְּאוֹתוֹ לָשׁוֹן עַצְמוֹ ״לֹא מָצָא עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ״ (בראשית ב:כ). וְנִכְתְּבוּ אֵלֶּה הַדְּבָרִים בֵּין הַמִּצְוָה וְהַחֵטְא, הַמִּצְוָה הָיְתָה לְאָדָם, וְאָדָם אָמַר לָאִשָּׁה אַחַר שֶׁהוּבְאָה אֵלָיו כִּי זֶה צִוָּה עָלָיו הָאֵל, וְהִיא קִבְּלָה הַמִּצְוָה כַּאֲשֶׁר אָמַר לָהּ אִישָׁהּ כִּי בַּת דַּעַת הָיְתָה וְיָדְעָה כִּי הָאֵל בְּרָאָם, וְהָיָה מְדַבֵּר אֲלֵיהֶם בְּאֶמְצָעוּת הַשֵּׂכֶל שֶׁנָּתַן לָהֶם עַל שְׁאָר בַּעֲלֵי חַיִּים הַשְּׁפָלִים. (ב)לֹא־טוֹב הֱיוֹת הָאָדָם לְבַדּוֹ. לֹא טוֹב שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לְבַדּוֹ בְּלֹא חֶבְרָה, כִּי אֵין לוֹ חֶבְרָה עִם הַבְּהֵמוֹת הַחַיּוֹת וְהָעוֹפוֹת כִּי אֵינוֹ שָׁוֶה עִמָּהֶם בַּבְּרִיאָה. (ג)אֶעֱשֶׂה־לּוֹ עֵזֶר. שֶׁיִּהְיֶה עוֹזֵר כַּאֲשֶׁר יִצְטָרֵךְ, כְּמוֹ שֶׁאָמַר (קהלת ד:ט) ״טוֹבִים הַשְּׁנַיִם מִן הָאֶחָד״, וְעוֹד שֶׁצָּרִיךְ לְהַשְׁאִיר אַחֲרָיו מִמִּינוֹ וְלֹא יִתָּכֵן זֶה מִבְּלִי אַחֵר שֶׁיִּהְיֶה מִמִּינוֹ. (ד)כְּנֶגְדּוֹ. שֶׁיִּהְיֶה לְפָנָיו וּלְעֶזְרָתוֹ תָּמִיד לְשָׁרְתוֹ, וְהַכָּף כְּכָ״ף ״כַּהַיּוֹם״ (שמואל א ט:יג), ״כְּמַשִּׂיגֵי גְבוּל״ (הושע ה:י), ״כְּמִתְאֹנְנִים״ (במדבר יא:א), וְהַדּוֹמִים לָהֶם, שֶׁהֵם לֶאֱמֶת הַדָּבָר וּלְחַזְּקוֹ. וּדְרָשׁ עֵזֶר כְּנֶגְדּוֹ יָדוּעַ: זָכָה – עֵזֶר, לֹא זָכָה – כְּנֶגְדּוֹ (בראשית רבה יז, יבמות סב:). וּמַה שֶּׁהִבְדִּילוֹ מִשְּׁאָר הַיְצוּרִים הַחַיִּים, כִּי כֻלָּם נִבְרְאוּ זָכָר וּנְקֵבָה וְהָאָדָם נִבְרָא לְבַדּוֹ, הָיָה זֶה לְטוֹבַת הָאָדָם וְלִכְבוֹדוֹ, כְּמוֹ שֶׁהוּא מֻבְדָּל מִשְּׁאָר הַחַיִּים בְּחָמְרוֹ וְצוּרָתוֹ. כִּי שְׁאָר הַחַיִּים אֵין לַזָּכָר יִתְרוֹן עַל הַנְּקֵבָה, וְהָאָדָם יֵשׁ לוֹ יִתְרוֹן עַל נְקֵבָתוֹ לִמְשֹׁל עָלֶיהָ וּלְצַוּוֹת אוֹתָהּ כַּאֲשֶׁר יִרְצֶה, כִּי הִיא אֶחָד מֵאֵבָרָיו, וּכְמוֹ שֶׁהָאֵבֶר שֶׁבָּאָדָם הוּא לִרְצוֹן אָדָם לְהַנְהִיגוֹ כַּאֲשֶׁר יִרְצֶה, כֵּן הָאִשָּׁה לָאָדָם. וּבַעֲבוּר שֶׁהָאָדָם עִקַּר הַיְצִירָה שֶׁנִּבְרָא תְּחִלָּה וְהָאִשָּׁה טְפֵלָה לוֹ וְנוֹצְרָה מִמֶּנּוּ, הָיָה כֹּחַ בָּאָדָם לְכָל דָּבָר יוֹתֵר מֵהַנְּקֵבָה, וְכֹחַ הַשֵּׂכֶל גּוֹבֵר בּוֹ יוֹתֵר מֵאֲשֶׁר בָּאִשָּׁה.

(1) ויאמר ה' אלוקים, G’d did not utter these words audibly, as is the meaning of the word when applied to human beings, but He “spoke” to Himself. Alternatively, G’d did utter words to that effect without directly addressing Adam, but Adam happened to hear these words. When the Torah speaks of “G’d speaking,” we must understand this as a sound created especially for that particular occasion. Seeing that Adam overheard the words אעשה לו עזר כנגדו, “I shall make for him a suitable companion,” he had entertained the hope that when all the animals paraded before him that he would encounter among them the helpmate, companion, G’d had spoken of. This is how we must understand the words in verse 20 ולאדם לא מצא עזר כנגדו, that he had not found a suitable helpmate when reviewing all the animals and naming them.
The Torah inserted these words between reporting on the commandment not to eat from the tree of knowledge and the sin, in order to make plain that man’s sin was due to the influence of the woman, as he had not eaten from this tree before she had been formed and been given to him as a mate, companion. Clearly, also when G’d gave Adam the commandments and forbade him to eat from that tree, seeing that the woman had not been created yet, she could not have heard this commandment from the mouth of G’d, but only from the mouth of her husband. The woman was clever enough to know that G’d had created both her husband and her. She presumed that communication from G’d took place by means of both her and her husband’s intellect, seeing that they were the only creatures who had been endowed with superior intellect. (2) לא טוב היות האדם לבדו, it is not good that he has no partner seeing that among the beasts he cannot find a partner, as none of them is on a par with him. (3) אעשה לו עזר, an assistant when the need should arise. Solomon, in Kohelet 4,9, paraphrased this when he wrote: טובים השנים מן האחד, “two are better than one alone.” Furthermore, woman was a necessity if man was to leave offspring behind to insure the continuity of his species. (4) כנגדו, she should be constantly present to attend to his needs; the prefix letter כ is to be understood as in Samuel I 9,13 כהיום, and as in Numbers 11,1 כמתאוננים, and as in Hoseah 5,10 כמסיגי גבול, in all of which instances the letter כ serves to emphasise what follows. (compare Genesis 25,31 where Yaakov insists that the sale of the birthright be effective immediately with the words כיום, “as of today”) Other explanations of the word כנגדו are that if and when her husband would embark on a sinful path of action, it would be woman’s task to prevent him from doing so by opposing it; these are familiar to all my readers, I am sure. The basic difference between man the species and woman his mate who were not initially created as two separate individuals as opposed to all the other living creatures, is to distinguish him favourably from all those other creatures. It draws attention to the fact that man is made from superior raw materials, and that as opposed to the other creatures among whom the male does not enjoy an advantage over the female, man, i.e. the male of the human species, does enjoy such an advantage. The male of the human species enjoys a position of authority vis a vis his female counterpart. The reason that he enjoys this right is the fact that woman is –after all- one of his own original limbs, and a person does have control over the various parts of his body. Seeing that the male of the human species had been the principal creation, woman became an adjunct to him, so that it is logical that man possesses superior strength to woman, and that also the power of his intellect is more manifest than that of his female counterpart.

(1) V. 18. In the same way as Creation tarried and waited its completion before Man was created, and God had announced to it this crown of His creation, so was the case here before the creation of Woman. Man was there, and all about him all the beauties of paradise blossomed, and still God did not pronounce His “טוב״! It does not say: לבדו לא טוב לאדם היותו, that it was not good for man to be alone, but לא טוב היות האדם לבדו “this is not good, Man being alone” as long as Man stands alone it is altogether not yet good, the goal of perfection, which the world is to attain through him will never be reached as long as he stands alone. The completion of the “good” was not Man but Woman, and it was only brought to mankind and the world by Woman. And this fact has been so deeply appreciated by those “orientals”, the “rabbis”, that they teach in the Talmud: only through his wife does a man become a “Man”, only husband and wife together are “Adam”. A task which is too great for one person must be divided, and just for the accomplishment of the whole of Man’s mission, God created Woman for Man. And this Woman is to be עזר כנגדו. Even looked at quite superficially this designation expresses the whole dignity of Woman. It contains not the slightest reference to any sexual relationship, she is placed purely in the realm of Man’s work, it was there that she was missing, she is to be עזר כנגדו. And עזר כנגדו certainly expresses no idea of subordination, but rather complete equality, and on a footing of equal independence. Woman stands to Man כנגדו, parallel, on one line, at his side. (2) עזר, to help, assist. Considered in the light of its corelated roots, peculiarly contradictory ideas appear which all have the underlying conception of restricting, confining, limiting; עצר ,אצר ,אסר ,אזר, and yet עזר, to help. So that עזר designates that kind of help which relieves the other from a part of his obligations (division of labour I.L.), allowing him thereby to concentrate his efforts to a smaller sphere of activity, and so to accomplish what is left to him in a more complete and perfect manner. It is a help by limiting and thus concentrating. Whereas עצר implies forcible (עזר ,(צ is the welcome restriction so as to be able to use one’s activities more powerfully in the restricted sphere so afforded. Thus the auxiliary hall was called the עזרה. Instead of the קרבנות having to be offered in the היכל, as otherwise would be the case, the עזרה allowed the היכל to be reserved for the highest כפרה, and all the ways that lead up to כפרה to be demonstrated in the “auxiliary” hall. In a similar way, the wife too is to take over a part of the obligations which comprise the great task of mankind, and thus make it possible for her husband to accomplish more perfectly the part that is left to him. But this is only possible if the being who is to be an עזר to him is כנגדו not עמו, does not work at what he is doing, but works opposite him. Were the other being a man, he himself would have all the obligations upon his own shoulders, and he would again need “help”. That is is why it is אשה, a “feminine man”, who stands, not with him, but next to him, נגדו, who works at another point in the same line, so that each one of them fills a separate position, and they mutually complement each other.

Did Chava lead humanity to sin?

(כ) וַיִּקְרָ֨א הָֽאָדָ֜ם שֵׁמ֗וֹת לְכׇל־הַבְּהֵמָה֙ וּלְע֣וֹף הַשָּׁמַ֔יִם וּלְכֹ֖ל חַיַּ֣ת הַשָּׂדֶ֑ה וּלְאָדָ֕ם לֹֽא־מָצָ֥א עֵ֖זֶר כְּנֶגְדּֽוֹ׃(כא) וַיַּפֵּל֩ יְהֹוָ֨ה אֱלֹהִ֧ים ׀ תַּרְדֵּמָ֛ה עַל־הָאָדָ֖ם וַיִּישָׁ֑ן וַיִּקַּ֗ח אַחַת֙ מִצַּלְעֹתָ֔יו וַיִּסְגֹּ֥ר בָּשָׂ֖ר תַּחְתֶּֽנָּה׃ (כב) וַיִּ֩בֶן֩ יְהֹוָ֨ה אֱלֹהִ֧ים ׀ אֶֽת־הַצֵּלָ֛ע אֲשֶׁר־לָקַ֥ח מִן־הָֽאָדָ֖ם לְאִשָּׁ֑ה וַיְבִאֶ֖הָ אֶל־הָֽאָדָֽם׃ (כג) וַיֹּ֘אמֶר֮ הָֽאָדָם֒ זֹ֣את הַפַּ֗עַם עֶ֚צֶם מֵֽעֲצָמַ֔י וּבָשָׂ֖ר מִבְּשָׂרִ֑י לְזֹאת֙ יִקָּרֵ֣א אִשָּׁ֔ה כִּ֥י מֵאִ֖ישׁ לֻֽקְחָה־זֹּֽאת׃ (כד) עַל־כֵּן֙ יַֽעֲזׇב־אִ֔ישׁ אֶת־אָבִ֖יו וְאֶת־אִמּ֑וֹ וְדָבַ֣ק בְּאִשְׁתּ֔וֹ וְהָי֖וּ לְבָשָׂ֥ר אֶחָֽד׃

(20) And the Human gave names to all the cattle and to the birds of the sky and to all the wild beasts; but no fitting counterpart for a human being was found. (21) So the ETERNAL God cast a deep sleep upon the Human; and, while he slept, [God] took one of his sides and closed up the flesh at that site. (22) And the ETERNAL God fashioned the side that had been taken from the Human into a woman, bringing her to the Human. (23) Then the Human said,
“This one at lastIs bone of my bonesAnd flesh of my flesh.This one shall be called the Woman, For from the Man was she taken.”(24) Hence a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, so that they become one flesh.

This calls into question the order of events in The Pomegranate Incident ™️ (the midrash (Bereshit Rabbah 15:7) debates if it is grapes, a citron, or figs). If they are co-created, then both Adam and Chava received instruction about not eating from The Tree, BUT, if we follow the second order of events, she's not around for the instruction and yet receives the blame.

זכר ונקבה ברא אותם. וּלְהַלָּן הוּא אוֹמֵר וַיִּקַּח אַחַת מִצַּלְעֹתָיו וגו' (בראשית ב')? מִדְרַשׁ אַגָּדָה שֶׁבְּרָאוֹ שְׁנֵי פַרְצוּפִים בִּבְרִיאָה רִאשׁוֹנָה, וְאַחַר כָּךְ חֲלָקוֹ. וּפְשׁוּטוֹ שֶׁל מִקְרָא, כָּאן הוֹדִיעֲךָ שֶׁנִּבְרְאוּ שְׁנֵיהֶם בַּשִּׁשִּׁי וְלֹא פֵי' לְךָ כֵּיצַד בְּרִיָּתָן, וּפֵרֵשׁ לְךָ בְּמָקוֹם אַחֵר:

זכר ונקבה ברא אותם MALE AND FEMALE CREATED HE THEM — And further on (Genesis 2:21) it is said: “and He took one of his ribs etc.” (The two passages appear to be contradictory.) But according to a Midrashic explanation, He created him at first with two faces, and afterwards He divided him. But the real sense of the verse is: here it tells you that both of them were created on the sixth day, but it does not explain to you how their creation took place; this it explains to you in another place (Genesis Rabbah 8:1 and see Eruvin 18a) .

זכר ונקבה ברא אתם כמו שפירש הכתוב ויקח אחת מצלעותיו.

זכר ונקבה ברא אותם, “He created them as possessing male and female organs.” This is explained in greater detail in Genesis 2,21, where the physical separation of the female from Adam is described as G-d building up one of Adam’s ribs into a whole new body.

זכר ונקבה ברא אותם - כמו שמפרש לפנינו ויקח אחת מצלעותיו, כלל ואח"כ פירש. וכן מצאתי בל"ב מדות של ר' אליעזר בנו של ר' יוסי הגלילי שלמד מפסוק זה כלל ואח"כ פרט.

זכר ונקבה ברא אותם, as the Torah will proceed to explain in detail in chapter 2,21 “He took one of Adam’s sides and fashioned Chavah from it.” We are simply faced here with the report of a generalisation first, followed by greater detail This is also what is described as one of the 32 methods by which Torah can be explained in the treatise of Rabbi Eliezer son of Rabbi Yossi hagalili, who explained this verse in this fashion.

human beings. This translation resorts to the plural to avoid using misleading masculine pronouns later in the verse. Literally the Hebrew has: “And God created the adam. In the image of God he created him/it; male and female he created them” (shifting the object pronoun from singular to plural). By referring to adam, the text is not describing an individual but a new class of beings that comprises female and male from the start, both of them in God’s image. This idea is repeated more clearly in 5:1-2. The shift from singular to plural does not convey that man was created before woman. (That the singular pronoun is masculine can be explained as necessary for grammatical gender agreement in the Hebrew language.) Rather, it seems to say that our humanity, as adam, precedes our division into sexual categories. Our humanity comes first; our sexual identity next.

male and female. This passage explicitly proclaims the co-creation of female and male, both in God’s image. It establishes the goodness and gender balance as the foundation for all that follows. The terms male (zachar) and female (n’kevah) designate biological categories, thus relevant to fertility, a major theme in this passage. The word zachar evokes the Hebrew word for “remembering,” and n’kevah evokes the word for being pierced.

(ג) אחת מצלעותיו, שתי צלעות היו כענין ולצלע המשכן השנית (שמות כו ו), ומלת צלע לשון נקבה, והטעם צד, (ד) תחתנה, מקומה והוא לשון יחיד הנו"ן נוסף ותחתיה לשון רבים, וכן תחתני גם תחתי:

(3) ONE OF HIS RIBS. Adam had two sides. Tzela here is like tzela (side) in and for the second side (tzela) of the tabernacle (Ex. 26:20). Tzela is a feminine noun. It means a side. (4) INSTEAD THEREOF. Tachtennah means in its place. Tachtennah (instead thereof) spelled with a superfluous nun is in the singular. Tachtehah is its plural form. Tachteni (under me) and tachtai (under me) are similar.

This is the way we explain this issue away. Man is created as hermaphrodite and then split into two sexes or the singular "man" is actually secretly plural. As dubious as this sounds, it tracks. In the first version, we have אדם for "human" and זכר and נקבה for male and female, respectively. In the second version, we have אדם for "human" and איש and אשה for "man" and "woman", respectively.

(א) וְהַנָּחָשׁ֙ הָיָ֣ה עָר֔וּם מִכֹּל֙ חַיַּ֣ת הַשָּׂדֶ֔ה אֲשֶׁ֥ר עָשָׂ֖ה יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהִ֑ים וַיֹּ֙אמֶר֙ אֶל־הָ֣אִשָּׁ֔ה אַ֚ף כִּֽי־אָמַ֣ר אֱלֹהִ֔ים לֹ֣א תֹֽאכְל֔וּ מִכֹּ֖ל עֵ֥ץ הַגָּֽן׃ (ב) וַתֹּ֥אמֶר הָֽאִשָּׁ֖ה אֶל־הַנָּחָ֑שׁ מִפְּרִ֥י עֵֽץ־הַגָּ֖ן נֹאכֵֽל׃ (ג) וּמִפְּרִ֣י הָעֵץ֮ אֲשֶׁ֣ר בְּתוֹךְ־הַגָּן֒ אָמַ֣ר אֱלֹהִ֗ים לֹ֤א תֹֽאכְלוּ֙ מִמֶּ֔נּוּ וְלֹ֥א תִגְּע֖וּ בּ֑וֹ פֶּן־תְּמֻתֽוּן׃

(1) Now the serpent was the shrewdest of all the wild beasts that the ETERNAL God had made. It said to the woman, “Did God really say: You shall not eat of any tree of the garden?” (2) The woman replied to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the other trees of the garden. (3) It is only about fruit of the tree in the middle of the garden that God said: ‘You shall not eat of it or touch it, lest you die.’”

Either way, it doesn't even matter if Chava was not told directly, she knows the rule. Either Adam told her or Hashem told her and we were not privy to that moment.

(ד) וַיֹּ֥אמֶר הַנָּחָ֖שׁ אֶל־הָֽאִשָּׁ֑ה לֹֽא־מ֖וֹת תְּמֻתֽוּן׃ (ה) כִּ֚י יֹדֵ֣עַ אֱלֹהִ֔ים כִּ֗י בְּיוֹם֙ אֲכׇלְכֶ֣ם מִמֶּ֔נּוּ וְנִפְקְח֖וּ עֵֽינֵיכֶ֑ם וִהְיִיתֶם֙ כֵּֽאלֹהִ֔ים יֹדְעֵ֖י ט֥וֹב וָרָֽע׃ (ו) וַתֵּ֣רֶא הָֽאִשָּׁ֡ה כִּ֣י טוֹב֩ הָעֵ֨ץ לְמַאֲכָ֜ל וְכִ֧י תַֽאֲוָה־ה֣וּא לָעֵינַ֗יִם וְנֶחְמָ֤ד הָעֵץ֙ לְהַשְׂכִּ֔יל וַתִּקַּ֥ח מִפִּרְי֖וֹ וַתֹּאכַ֑ל וַתִּתֵּ֧ן גַּם־לְאִישָׁ֛הּ עִמָּ֖הּ וַיֹּאכַֽל׃ (ז) וַתִּפָּקַ֙חְנָה֙ עֵינֵ֣י שְׁנֵיהֶ֔ם וַיֵּ֣דְע֔וּ כִּ֥י עֵֽירֻמִּ֖ם הֵ֑ם וַֽיִּתְפְּרוּ֙ עֲלֵ֣ה תְאֵנָ֔ה וַיַּעֲשׂ֥וּ לָהֶ֖ם חֲגֹרֹֽת׃ (ח) וַֽיִּשְׁמְע֞וּ אֶת־ק֨וֹל יְהֹוָ֧ה אֱלֹהִ֛ים מִתְהַלֵּ֥ךְ בַּגָּ֖ן לְר֣וּחַ הַיּ֑וֹם וַיִּתְחַבֵּ֨א הָֽאָדָ֜ם וְאִשְׁתּ֗וֹ מִפְּנֵי֙ יְהֹוָ֣ה אֱלֹהִ֔ים בְּת֖וֹךְ עֵ֥ץ הַגָּֽן׃ (ט) וַיִּקְרָ֛א יְהֹוָ֥ה אֱלֹהִ֖ים אֶל־הָֽאָדָ֑ם וַיֹּ֥אמֶר ל֖וֹ אַיֶּֽכָּה׃ (י) וַיֹּ֕אמֶר אֶת־קֹלְךָ֥ שָׁמַ֖עְתִּי בַּגָּ֑ן וָאִירָ֛א כִּֽי־עֵירֹ֥ם אָנֹ֖כִי וָאֵחָבֵֽא׃ (יא) וַיֹּ֕אמֶר מִ֚י הִגִּ֣יד לְךָ֔ כִּ֥י עֵירֹ֖ם אָ֑תָּה הֲמִן־הָעֵ֗ץ אֲשֶׁ֧ר צִוִּיתִ֛יךָ לְבִלְתִּ֥י אֲכׇל־מִמֶּ֖נּוּ אָכָֽלְתָּ׃ (יב) וַיֹּ֖אמֶר הָֽאָדָ֑ם הָֽאִשָּׁה֙ אֲשֶׁ֣ר נָתַ֣תָּה עִמָּדִ֔י הִ֛וא נָֽתְנָה־לִּ֥י מִן־הָעֵ֖ץ וָאֹכֵֽל׃ (יג) וַיֹּ֨אמֶר יְהֹוָ֧ה אֱלֹהִ֛ים לָאִשָּׁ֖ה מַה־זֹּ֣את עָשִׂ֑ית וַתֹּ֙אמֶר֙ הָֽאִשָּׁ֔ה הַנָּחָ֥שׁ הִשִּׁיאַ֖נִי וָאֹכֵֽל׃

(4) And the serpent said to the woman, “You are not going to die, (5) but God knows that as soon as you eat of it your eyes will be opened and you will be like divine beings who know good and bad.” (6) When the woman saw that the tree was good for eating and a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable as a source of wisdom, she took of its fruit and ate. She also gave some to her husband, and he ate. (7) Then the eyes of both of them were opened and they perceived that they were naked; and they sewed together fig leaves and made themselves loincloths. (8) They heard the sound of the ETERNAL God moving about in the garden at the breezy time of day; and the Human and his wife hid from the ETERNAL God among the trees of the garden. (9) The ETERNAL God called out to the Human and said to him, “Where are you?” (10) He replied, “I heard the sound of You in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid.” (11) “Who told you that you were naked? Did you eat of the tree from which I had forbidden you to eat?” (12) The Human said, “The woman You put at my side—she gave me of the tree, and I ate.” (13) And the ETERNAL God said to the woman, “What is this you have done!” The woman replied, “The serpent duped me, and I ate.”